Rain in the Ocean
by Gemmi92
Summary: "You will marry him regardless of whether you want to," Cal spat at me. I glared back at him, my hands in fists by my sides as I did so. He had lied to me. He had lied so coldly and easily. "I will do what I want to!" I yelled back at him. " He chuckled at hearing that, shaking his head back and forth. "You are a Hockley. You will do well to remember that."
1. Chapter 1

They said it was the world's unsinkable ship. They had spoken of it for months on end, the excitement keeping people awake with the prospect of boarding it. It was vast, there was no denying it. Luxurious was another word which could be used to describe it. But it was nothing more than a ship when I looked at it.

It was beautiful. I had to admit that. But I didn't think much more of it. I didn't think much more other than the fact that it was taking me back to America. The United States had been my home for such a long time. I had loved living there as a child, rushing around our family's vast home and being told that it was something which I could not do for much longer. They had been right, of course.

My sixteenth birthday had come too quickly for my liking. I had been told that I was to marry as soon as possible. Many suitors had been lined up, willing to spend the rest of their life living with me. I had scoffed at every single one of them, telling my mother that it was improper for a woman to marry without love. I also told her that it was unfair that I was not to have an education anymore. Learning was something which I had thoroughly enjoyed in my life.

It had taken much persuading and much pleading, but my parents had allowed me to leave for a while. They had granted me permission to travel to England as long as my maid came with me. My father knew of a man who resided in Cambridge, a professor at the university there. He had told me that I was to study there for three years on the condition that a marriage was inevitable when I returned.

I felt as though I had no choice but to accept. I had managed to buy myself three whole years more. I had seen to it that time was in my favour. But those three years had gone too quickly for my liking. My results had been recorded at the university and I had done favourably well. A lot of people had looked at me as though I was odd. A woman past the age of sixteen and still studying was something which was unheard of. Yet a lot of women pushed for further education. It was a shame that their voices were ignored.

"They say it is the fastest ship in many years."

I looked across to where my brother sat, his eyes fixed firmly out of the window and on the ship which remained docked. I said nothing in response, looking across to the other seat in the carriage where his guests sat. I took in the appearance of the girl who was three years younger than I. She continued to look unimpressed. She never truly looked happy about anything.

"I do hope so, Mr Hockley," the elder woman said. "I also hope it is as grand as they say."

"I don't think you have anything to worry about, mother," the girl finally spoke, her lips snarling on the word 'mother'. I didn't know much about my brother's companions. I had briefly met them in Cambridge as they travelled down to the ship. I had to admit that I had been shocked to see my brother stood outside my door. It had been a surprise.

Mother and father had said nothing about my return to Philadelphia. I had almost hoped that they had forgotten I was to be travelling back home that year. But, it was not to be. They had informed my brother to collect me and make sure I came back home.

That was how I found myself waiting in a car for the boarding of the Titanic to commence.

"And what do you think, Emily?" my brother turned to me. I looked back at him, a brow arched as he smirked at me, the usual air of cockiness surrounding him. "You studied history for all those months. Surely you have an opinion of such grand architecture?"

"I do," I responded to him. "I doubt you'd be interested, Cal. I admit that it hardly interests me."

A soft chime of laughter came from the young red hear whilst her mother looked unimpressed. It seemed that the DeWitt Bukaters were a hard family to impress. Cal chuckled deeply before wrapping my hand into his and pressing his lips against my knuckles in a gesture of brotherly affection.

"Oh, how I have missed your charm and wit, dear sister," he exclaimed and I resisted the urge which came over me to roll my eyes at his tone. He dropped my hand again and pushed a stray curl behind my ear before turning to look back at the vast ship.

I did the same for a moment before the car finally stopped. Cal climbed out first, aiding Rose's mother from the carriage before helping his own fiancée. I was the last one out before I looked up to the ship and sighed.

"Mother and father have a suitor lined up for you," Cal informed me as Rose and Ruth began to talk amongst themselves. Perhaps talk was the wrong word. Bicker should suffice. I said nothing as Cal rested his hand on the small of my back and we began to move forwards as he clicked his fingers at Lovejoy.

Lovejoy had been in Cal's employment for years. He was a man with a receding hairline and a strict face. He did nothing to ease me when he was in our presence for he was a dangerous man. Cal would not have hired him if he wasn't.

"I can only imagine how devilishly handsome he will be," I responded. It earned me a click of Cal's teeth as we walked through the crowds who continued to look at us as if we were some form of noble Gods. "Honestly, the thought of spending my life with a man who I do not love is something which I cannot wait for."

Cal snapped slightly, his black hair falling into his face and dangling over his forehead. He grabbed hold of my wrist, stopping me from moving as he forced me to face him, his eyes burning into mine seriously.

"You are a Hockley," he pointed out to me. "You are to act respectfully at all times. Our parents require you to marry. It is your duty, Emily. No man wants a woman who is rude and disrespectful."

"No," I agreed. "He just wants a woman with a vast dowry."

"You've been allowed free reign for too long," Cal warned me. "It is time for you to return to normality. You made an agreement with our parents. Now you have to honour it."

I managed to snatch my wrist away from Cal and begin to move forwards, his hand instantly finding my back again as if he was scared that I would attempt to run away from him. We finally came to the plank leading up to the ship and I froze for a moment, realising that this was it. I was going back to a life of hopelessness and endless parties amongst those who I did not know.

"Emily," Cal spoke my name once again and I rolled my eyes. I moved up the plank, one hand on the railing and the other by my side as we came to the doorway. A young blonde boy stood there, bowing as each guest entered and paid him no attention. I allowed a graceful smile in his direction before Cal demanded to be shown to his rooms. He had managed to book the most luxurious suite on the entire ship, no doubt courtesy of the family money.

"It is lovely, is not, dear sister?" Cal attempted to make conversation with me as he picked up my hand and placed it on the crook of his arm. I held onto him for a few moments before he looked down at me, waiting for an answer.

"Quite," I replied in a small voice to him. Cal could sense that my attitude had changed from the simple one word answer he had received. His reminder of my fate seemed to change my attitude for a while, and not for the better.

"I am sure whoever is waiting in Philadelphia for you is worthy enough, Emily," he told me as if I was supposed to be relieved at that piece of information. I held my breath for a moment, the corset I wore digging into my skin as I did so. "Mother and father will have made sure of it. You'll be a doting wife, a loving mother and the highest woman in the social circle."

"What more could I want?" I replied without thinking, sarcasm dripping from my voice as Cal huffed loudly.

"Nothing," he declared. "You will have a marriage like mine and Rose's."

I sincerely hope not. I said nothing in response to him as his gaze settled on Rose and I saw something cloud over in his eyes. The moment he had introduced me to her I had been shocked. I thought she was far too young for him. She was quite a beauty, there was no denying that. But, she was a young girl. She didn't love him; that much I could tell. It was only confirmed when Cal had told me that it was an arranged marriage between the pair of them.

I didn't know if he loved her. I supposed he cared for her. She was beautiful and delicate like an English rose. But I did not know whether it was lust or love which drove my brother.

"Besides, you have yet to meet your future husband. Do not judge him before you meet him. An arranged marriage was always inevitable, Emily. Father only allowed you to go to Cambridge to dissolve the recklessness from you."

I said nothing, knowing full well that arguing with my brother was pointless. He removed his jacket from his shoulders as soon as he stepped inside of the suite which was having furniture moved into it. Rose stood there, her hands busying themselves by looking at art which my brother had provided for her.

Her mother had retired to her own room, claiming that she was tired from the journey. I'd snorted at that as we had only spent one hour travelling in a car. The woman was not to my liking, much too presumptuous and believing herself to be almighty. Rose had seemed slightly like her mother with her attitude. She had been accustomed to fine things in life; her own attitude also seemed self righteous at times.

And then I would catch a glimpse at her looking at Cal, and her gaze always clouded over.

"Emily," Cal said and snapped me from my thoughts as I looked at the ballerina portrait. "Your room is down the hall. Mary will show you to it."

I turned around as my maid stood in the doorway and she quickly curtseyed in front of me. I smiled softly at her and nodded, ignoring my brother and Rose as they begun to discuss art. Mary had been with me since my childhood, only ten years older than me and a constant source of information. She had been to Cambridge and stayed with me during my studies, suffering my constant foul tempers and mood swings.

"Your brother has found you a nice suite, Miss Hockley," she told me and I resisted the need to roll my eyes. "Your things are being brought there now."

"I do hope they are not unpacking for me," I complained, hating it when people placed things in the wrong areas. Mary smiled at hearing me before opening the door to a sight of trunk upon trunk which sat at the foot of a four poster bed. I sighed as she closed the door and we began to open the trunks, looking into them and hanging up gowns whilst talking.

"You should change into your evening gown, Miss Hockley," she informed me as time continued to pass by. "Your brother requests you join him and his fiancée tonight for dinner. I can finish unpacking for you."

"Well, if my brother wishes it then I have no choice but to obey," I spoke back, my voice one of irony as I did so. Mary bit down on her lips and held up a light pink dress for me to observe. It was plain pink, the neckline rather low on my chest. A simple pink sash tied around the waist and a bow sat on the side.

She helped me change, re-lacing my corset and almost draining the life from me as she did so, pulling tightly on the strings to keep me hidden. I looked in the mirror and looked back, completely not at ease with my appearance. Mary kept telling me that there was nothing wrong with being thin and having no shape. But I knew she was lying. I could tell she said things to keep me happy.

Once the dress was on then my hair was worked at. She tied the limp curls together and tucked my hair over one shoulder before handing me my white gloves.

I never forgot the amount of effort it took to ready me for dinner. I stood up and continued to help Mary unpack everything until there was a knock on the door. I ran the brush from the wooden dresser through my hair one more time before Cal stepped into the room. He wore his dinner suit, his hair pristine on top of his head as he approvingly nodded at me.

"You look as beautiful as always, dear sister," he informed me whilst Mary kept her head bowed and her body hidden behind the door.

"I feel silly," I complained to him and he shook his head, holding his arm out.

"Nonsense," he spoke. "Now come along. We have a dinner to attend."

I took a swift glance back at Mary who nodded as Cal led me through the halls and to the main dining hall. No expense had been spared as I glanced around, looking at the glass chandeliers which hung from the ceiling, lighting the space below them. Cutlery had already been lined on the tables yet no one sat down. Every remained stood up, walking around their tables and socialising with each other. Rose stood on one side with her mother, speaking to a large woman with a booming laugh.

"Ah, George," Cal spoke and I turned to look at the man in front of us. Cal offered him his hand to shake, the usual business way of greeting someone. "How good to see you again. I trust you remember my sister, Emily?"

And that was how the next half an hour passed. Meetings and greetings took place, proper behaviour had to be shown, and Cal often reminded me to be pleasant. I said nothing as he continued to take charge of the conversation, simply introducing me when he needed to.

I couldn't wait until it was time to sit down at the table and begin the dinner. Cal sat beside Rose, ordering dinner for her as I sat beside her mother. It was simply the four of us for that evening and I could not think of a more awkward situation.

"So, Emily," Ruth decided to break the ice, "Cal tells us that you are to marry when you return to Philadelphia."

"I suppose so," I said, glancing over at my big brother who smirked and drank some of his wine.

"She'll make an excellent wife," Cal declared and I scoffed. "She's well educated now. Although I still struggle to understand why she spent years with her head in books."

"Some women prefer to be educated." The sentence spoken was like something I would hear myself say. But it had not fallen from my lips. I looked over to where Rose sat next to my brother, her gaze settled on Cal as she did so. "There is nothing wrong with being knowledgeable."

And for one moment I felt slight respect for her. She looked across to me and I wondered who she truly was.

"Yes, well," Cal coughed awkwardly before our food was served. One waiter set down Rose and Cal's meals whilst another set down Ruth's plate before placing mine in front of me. The boy was clearly nervous, his face was red and sweat dropped down his forehead as he awkwardly leaned around me and set the plate down. But he missed the table. His hand instantly slipped on the fine china as the plate of scallops tumbled into my lap.

I shrieked at the heat of it as the boy grabbed the napkin from the table and began to pick them from my lap. I helped him, our hands brushing together as I did so.

"You idiot," Cal snapped quickly at the boy. "Do you see what you have done to my sister's gown?"

"It's fine," I spat back as the boy began to wipe the stain on my pink dress, worsening it as it soaked in. I pushed his hand from me as he stood up and Cal continued to glare at him.

"What makes you think you can put your hands on my sister?" Cal snapped quickly and I looked across to him, still holding the napkin in my gloved hands.

"Cal," I responded. "I'm fine. It is just a gown."

"I'm sorry, Miss," the boy began to speak and I shook my head. "I didn't mean to be so clumsy."

"Of course not," I agreed with him. "It's fine. It is just a gown."

"You shouldn't be serving on us if you can't manage to place a plate down. Perhaps third class would suit you," Cal snarled and my cheeks decided to warm up as I glared at my brother for his rude behaviour towards the boy.

"Cal," I snapped before looking around at all the people who continued to stare at us. "You're attracting attention. Leave the poor boy alone. No one was hurt."

"Mr Hockley," a new voice spoke as someone came to stand at the foot of the table by the side of the embarrassed blonde waiter. "Has something happened here?"

"Yes," Cal said and I rolled my eyes, looking to the boy who continued to stare boldly back at me. I willed him to stop, knowing that Cal's temper would only increase if the boy continued with his staring. "This boy here spilt scallops on my sister's gown. I consider that inadequate service."

"It's fine," I said again only to be ignored.

"My apologies, Miss Hockley," the waiter in charge spoke. "I shall have the gown cleaned courtesy of White Star Line."

"There really is no-"

"-Good," Cal interrupted me and I gritted my teeth together. "And the boy?"

"Shall not be serving you again, sir."

Cal nodded and waved a hand to excuse them before he took another drink of his wine, shaking his head back and forth in disgust.

"Honestly," Ruth spoke, "that is not what you expect from such a prestigious ship."

"No," Cal agreed with her. "The boy ought to be dismissed."

"It was an accident," I hissed at my brother. "They happen all the time. There is no need to punish the boy. I am sure he already feels bad."

"As he should," Cal said and I stood up from my seat. Cal stood too, watching me intently with a warning look in his eyes.

"And where are you going?" he wondered.

"To change. I have a stain on my dress and I smell of scallop," I complained. "I'll take dinner in my room tonight."

"Emily-"

"-I want to," I interrupted before Cal could demand otherwise. I rushed off, sensing his glare on the back of my head. I knew he wouldn't come after me. He would simply wait until morning before telling me how rude and ungrateful I was. I noted eyes on me as I left, their orbs instantly trailing down to the stain on my pink dress as I sighed loudly.

But I didn't head back to my room. I found myself on the boat deck, the cool air on my skin and chilling my blazing red cheeks. I inhaled sharply and stood against the railings, my hands resting around the white metal as I looked down at the sea.

The area was quiet in the first class section, most people deciding to stay indoors and remain warm with their drink and food.

"Miss?"

I turned my head over my shoulder before looking at the boy who stood a few steps behind me. His hands were behind his back, his eyes downcast and his blonde hair in his face. His cheeks were still red, contrasting prominently against his white jacket suit.

"Emily," I replied simply. "My name is Emily."

"I saw you leave the dining room," he explained, his green eyes lifting from the wooden deck to find mine. "I came to apologise for my clumsiness."

"Honestly, it is no bother," I promised him and he looked to the stain. I followed his gaze and moved my hands to rest over it, drawing his gaze back to mine.

"I should have looked what I was doing," he complained once more. "I never meant to drop the scallops on you."

"It would be odd if you did decide to drop them on me," I said, trying to make light of the conversation. I noticed his lips turn up slightly at hearing that and I continued to smile softly at him. "I'm sorry for my brother. Cal can be quite obnoxious when he wants to be."

"Mr Hockley was right."

"No, he wasn't," I replied. "Are you sure you are fine? It can't be easy being yelled at and dismissed in public."

"You do not need to concern yourself with me, Miss," he replied and I shook my head.

"Honestly, tell me the truth," I urged him. "I don't want you to be scared because of my brother."

"Everyone knows Mr Hockley and his temper," the boy said and I arched a brow, an amused look coming over my face as he turned a deeper shade of red. "I shouldn't have said that." He shook his head and I stepped closer to him.

"It's not an issue," I promised him simply. "Believe me, I'm his sister. I know all about his temper. No one should bear the brunt of it. What's your name?"

"Edward, Miss Hockley," he replied and I nodded at him.

"Well, Edward," I spoke, "my name is Emily and not Miss Hockley. I would also like to apologise once again for my brother's behaviour. There really is nothing to worry about."

"You're not mad?" he checked and I almost rolled my eyes in an unladylike fashion.

"No," I assured him. "Accidents happen. I could tell you were nervous."

"Been sweating all night, Miss," he complained to me and I laughed once as his shoulders slumped slightly and he seemed to relax. "Never been so nervous before. And then I go and spill scallops over a pretty gal like you."

I took the compliment in my stride, knowing that it meant nothing as most of them always did. The boy pushed his hand through his hair, his fingers still shaking slightly as he did so and I watched him.

"No harm," I promised. "Anyway, I should be getting back to my room."

"Do you need an escort, Miss?" he wondered and I thought for a moment. "The head waiter told me to leave for the night. Perhaps if I can get you back to your room and do something right then I may be redeemed."

"I suppose so," I spoke and he offered me his arm. I took it and he led me back indoors. I knew it wasn't proper for a servant to escort a girl like me, but I failed to care. I ignored people as they watched us move, only catching the eye of Lovejoy. He stared at me for a moment and I knew he was mentally clocking my behaviour to tell Cal.

Only in the morning would I receive the scolding which was due to come my way.

...

A/N: My first fic for the fandom! Anyway, thanks for reading and let me know what you think and if you want more of it!


	2. Chapter 2

Mary took my dress away as soon as I had changed into my nightgown, deeming it necessary to clean the stain from it as soon as possible. I sat on my bed in my white nightgown, holding a book in my hand and reading about the history of Roman civilisation. Mary had left me for the evening, informing me that she would retire as soon as she had sorted my dress out. I assured her that it could wait until morning, but she was adamant.

And so I sat up in my chamber, deciding to do nothing more for the evening. I thought back to Edward and his charming smile along with his floppy blonde hair. There was no denying that he was handsome. Although I was used to handsome men. They were normally everywhere in my social circles.

Yet Edward seemed different. He was typically English and charming as we laughed on the way back to my cabin which was down the hall from Cal's room. I was well aware that Cal was going to be in a foul mood when I saw him again. He already had his spy keeping his eye on me which was quite annoying. He seemed to do nothing if not watch me and make sure I behaved. Walking down the corridors with a servant was not something which was proper behaviour.

I thought no more of my brother until I heard a knock on my cabin door. The sound was forceful and not the usual tap which Mary made when she waited for me to answer.

"Emily, open this door right now." I squirmed slightly at the sound of Cal's voice, but pushed the quilt back from my body. I decided to move quickly, scrambling over to the door and opening it. He stood there, watching me intently and waiting for me to move to the side for entry.

"I assume you're here because of your spy?" I checked with him and he forced me to the side, walking into the room. I closed the door and turned around, watching as Cal stood there, his hands on his hips as he looked me up and down, obviously inspecting me.

"Have you eaten dinner?" he wondered firstly. Of course he did care for my health. He also thought that I was too gaunt and that mother would have a fit if she saw me looking so thin.

"I wasn't hungry," I replied simply, looking down to the floor for a moment.

"No, I suppose you wouldn't be," Cal spoke, a small dark chuckle coming from his lips as he did so. "You were too busy spending time with a servant, weren't you?"

"He had come to ask for my forgiveness," I snapped at him. "I didn't realise you were against that? I thought manners were everything in today's society?"

"And you deemed it necessary for him to walk you back here?" Cal checked with me and I rolled my eyes.

"Don't you have a fiancée to tend to?" I wondered from him, motioning to the door and wanting nothing more than peace and quiet for the evening. I couldn't be bothered with Cal and his speech on properness and ladylike behaviour.

"Do not dismiss me, Emily," he snapped at me. "Honestly, what has become of you? Mother will be disgusted if you speak to her in such a manner."

"Cal," I complained, "he walked me back here. That is all there is to it? Why are you acting like this? He did nothing wrong. Honestly, you need to calm down."

"And you need to remember that you are a Hockley. You are not to associate with low life."

"You really do have a stick up your ass like father," I spat at him, tiring of his behaviour. He looked at me with utter disgust for a moment and I knew I had angered him more than I should have. His jaw locked and his cheeks reddened slightly as I folded my arms across my stomach, my throat drying up as I shook my head.

"I'm sorry," I began to apologise. "I didn't-"

"-You meant it," Cal concluded to me, moving closer with intent. "You mean everything that you say, Emily. You're nothing if not outspoken."

"Cal," I drawled. "I'm tired and you are overreacting."

"You are my sister," Cal snapped at me, his hand moving quickly and grabbing onto my chin. He forced me to look at him, dropping his shoulders and hunching over so that he was looking me straight in the eye.

"You are my own flesh and blood, Emily," Cal spoke. "I care about what happens to you. I want the best for you. Wandering around with a servant is not the best for you. The Hockley name is something which you need to live up to. You are twenty years old and you should know etiquette by now. Rose certainly does."

"I'm not a doting fiancée," I responded. "Although your fiancée is hardly doting, is she?"

"What is that supposed to mean?" Cal wondered, dropping my chin and standing tall once again. I shook my head, rolling my eyes as I did so. I could hardly believe that he didn't recognise it. She couldn't make her distaste for my brother anymore obvious.

"Nothing," I mumbled. "Surely you see how Rose is anything but doting."

"Are you implying that my fiancée is unhappy?"

"I'm not implying anything," I snapped at him. "Stop putting words into my mouth."

He regarded me with distaste for another moment, the look in his eye something I had not seen before. Cal had always been kind to me when I was young. He had been an elder brother who had protected his younger sister. But he had changed during the years. Time with father and the business had changed him, and not for the better.

"You're to act like a proper lady from now on, Emily," he warned me and I nodded. It was much easier to agree than to argue with him. And all I wanted at the moment in time was for him to leave me alone. "No more running around with servants and no more speaking against me."

"As you wish," I mumbled and Cal nodded, moving his hand out and brushing his knuckles down my cheek. He regarded me with content for a moment before moving to the door again.

"Father should never have given into your commands. Education seems to have disagreed with your duty as a woman." He said and the door finally shut. I watched the wood for a moment before shaking my head and moving back to my bed. I knew that sleep wouldn't come easily, for every time I closed my eyes, I thought of my future in Philadelphia.

...

"Cal was rather angry last night."

I looked up as the voice sounded, turning my head to the side and seeing the woman who had taken a seat beside me. I sat on a lounger on deck, a book in my hand as I escaped Cal's watchful gaze after spending half an hour discussing family arrangements. The red head had taken her seat beside me, her head looking at the book which I was reading.

"I gathered that when he stormed into my room and demanded that I act like a Hockley should."

"And how is that?" she asked me.

"With respect and decorum. Apparently spending time with a servant does not satisfy that criteria." I complained, watching as her gaze found mine and a small smile graced her features. "Tell me, do you actually feel anything for my brother?"

My question seemed to take her off guard, her gaze leaving mine and turning to look back at the ocean for a few moments. She seemed thoughtful and I knew that her answer was not the one which Cal longed to hear.

"Whatever you feel does not change my opinion," I promised her. "I've seen the way you look at him. You look at him with distaste. You look at him with toleration, not what a fiancée should look."

Rose turned back to stare at me and I shrugged at her nonchalantly. She shook her head and glanced to the floor of the deck.

"Cal is a generous man," Rose said to me.

"But you don't love him," I concluded. "You don't need to worry. I'm not going to say anything. I have the joy of suffering the same fate as you when I return to Philadelphia."

"You're a Hockley," she spoke. "Surely you do not need to marry. You're financially secure."

"I do not need to do a lot of things that I do," I replied. "It is expected of me to marry. I promised my parents that I would when I returned home."

"Cal spoke highly of you," Rose said. "I thought that you were like him...he said you were prim and proper..."

"And you realised that Cal was wrong I hope?" I smirked and she smiled back at me, nodding softly in agreement.

"You're very well educated. I admit that I was shocked that you were so outspoken." Rose said and I snorted in disbelief, shaking my head back and forth before pushing a hand through my hair.

"Cal detests that trait," I said. "I think he detests many things about me. The years have changed us."

"Yet you are a dutiful sister in his presence," Rose said. "You admit that you are going back to marry a stranger. You do not speak out against that."

"Is there any point?" I wondered. "I made an agreement with my parents. I need to honour that...I could run away...I have thought about it...but there is no point. Cal has come to bring me home and I cannot do anything more."

"It looks as though we are to suffer the same fates," Rose informed me and it dawned on me that we were. We may be different, and I may not have taken to Rose, but we were in a similar position.

"Miss Emily."

We both looked up to where the voice had come from and I saw Edward stood there, fresh towels in his hands as he smiled softly down at me. Any trace of nervousness from the previous night seemed to have disappeared from him. We had managed to get along splendidly on the walk back to the cabin, laughing and joking as we went.

"Edward," I replied, instantly slapping my book shut and jumping to stand up. Rose remained sat where she was, looking up at me as the young boy stood there.

"I just thought I'd be polite," he spoke, explaining his sudden behaviour.

"Of course," I replied. "Anyway...Edward...this is Rose...my brother's fiancée."

"Pleasure," Edward bowed and Rose stood up. I flashed her a cautious glance as she offered her hand to Edward. He looked at it for a moment, taking it slowly and shaking it slowly as Rose watched him cautiously.

"Nice to meet you, Edward," Rose said. "Emily, I should be returning to Cal. I shall tell him that you've retired to your chamber for a nap."

I eyed Rose with suspicion for a moment, turning to look at Edward as he held the towels. A brief look of understanding passed between us and I watched her leave, her white gown flowing behind her as she went. Perhaps she was not who I had first thought her to be.

"I was just on the way to return these towels and then I have a break," Edward informed me. "Perhaps we can walk around the boat together?"

"Do you think that proper?" I wondered from him and he looked at me with suspicion for a moment. He arched a brow, confusion coming over him before he finally understood what I was talking of.

"I'm sorry, Miss," he spoke. "I thought that...but...you are a lady and I..."

"It doesn't matter," I assured him quickly. At hearing him blabber I decided that. I didn't care what Cal thought anymore. I had a small amount of time on this ship and I intended to use it wisely and have fun. God only knew I would have none of that when I returned home.

"You go and take the towels. I'll be here when you return."

He nodded at me and rushed away. I did nothing for a few moments, standing where I was and looking out onto the sea. I willed for Cal not to make an appearance and I thought of what Rose had told me. She had seemed different when we had spoken earlier. It was almost as though she and I had a mutual understanding about what was happening.

"May I escort you?"

I turned my head over my shoulder as Edward stood there, offering me his arm. I took it slowly, walking by his side around the deck of the ship. We walked slowly by each other's side, the sun shining down on us as a breeze came across.

"Your brother won't mind, will he?" Edward wondered from me. "He didn't seem awfully pleased with me last night."

"No...well...he doesn't need to know..." I whispered lowly to him.

"And if he did know?"

"No doubt I would be yelled at," I said. "Cal believes that I already act unladylike. Running around with servants doesn't please him. Besides, it is not good behaviour for a woman who is to marry."

"You're to marry?" Edward checked with me and I nodded, bowing my head as his green gaze settled on my face. "I didn't know, Miss."

"Few do," I admitted to him. "But...we're simply talking so I do not see there being any harm."

"I admit, Miss," he spoke. "I have been thinking of you quite a bit."

I arched a brow at hearing that, looking across to him as he blushed red, his timid gaze finding mine and I smiled before laughing loudly, attracting stares from people who moved around us. Edward said nothing, his smile increasing as both of us stopped walking and turned to look out to sea.

"Do you say that to all the girls?" I asked him, my hands lacing around the wooden railing as he leant against it, his elbow resting on the flat surface.

"Only the good looking ones," he joked and I snorted in an unladylike fashion. I ran my hands over my cream dress skirts before turning to look up at him. "I've meet many gals in first class," he told me. "None of them have been like you. None of them have stuck up for me before."

"Most of them are spoilt brats," I informed him and he smirked at hearing that. "Besides, I haven't spent time with many of them."

"What was it like in Cambridge? They say only a few gals get to study there."

"It's true," I said. "There were many men there who consider it improper for a woman to find an education in her life."

"I think it is a good thing," he said to me. "Besides, you've proved you're not just another pretty face."

"Why thank you very much," I laughed again and he said nothing, pushing a hand through his hair and then turning to look at me. "And how did you end up here?"

"Quite a simple story," he assured me. "Mother died when I was a baby. My father was a drunk who barely managed to take care of me. I've spent most of my life in work and serving those above me. I try not to think of my past too much."

"Why?"

"Nothing but bad memories," he shrugged. "I prefer to look forward to the future. It's much more promising, isn't it?"

"I suppose so," I whispered, not truly understanding how easy my life was in comparison. I never thought of it. I chose only to think of those things which were bad. And when I look at them, they are hardly terrible.

"Anyway, we don't want to change the conversation to a topic of sadness, do we?" he replied with an upbeat smirk. I said nothing as he looked back to the sea before us. "It's been real nice to meet you, Miss Emily. I promise you that. You're a real nice gal."

"Emily."

I froze as I heard the distinct voice of Cal ring into my ears. Edward stiffened to, turning to look at Cal who was moving closer to us. Rose stood behind him, stuck to the spot and unable to move any closer. She had tried to lie for me yet Cal had seemingly insisted on a walk. A walk that would lead them to me and Edward.

"What do you think you are doing with my sister?" Cal snapped quickly and I rolled my eyes.

"We were talking," I replied. "Is that a crime, brother?"

"I shall speak with you later," Cal warned me and I shook my head in disgust. "Answer me, boy."

"I simply wanted to talk with Miss Hockley," he replied. "I meant no harm."

"And why would you want to speak with my sister? Why would you want to associate with her? Don't tell me you have taken a futile fancy to her, have you? A pretty rich girl who you can try and have?"

"Cal!" I snapped at him. "That's enough. Leave him alone!"

"Miss Emily is a nice lady," Edward said. "I meant no disrespect."

"He knows," I promised Edward. "Everything is fine."

"Nothing is fine, Emily," Cal replied to me and he took hold of my wrist in his sweating palm. I wormed around in his hold as he shot another glare in Edward's direction. He began to open his mouth, intent on saying something to my brother, but I shook my head, urging him to remain silent.

"Do you always intend to defy me?" Cal wondered, dragging me back into the enclosed space of the ship, walking through the halls with purpose. Rose followed dutifully, her eyes downcast as she did so. She said nothing, knowing full well that it was pointless in speaking against Cal.

"Stop it, Cal," I snapped at him. "You're hurting me."

"Don't moan to me, Emily," he warned me and I shook my head, annoyance taking over as we finally came to his cabin. He opened the door, ushering me and Rose inside before slamming the door shut. He dropped his hands to his hips as Rose stood beside me, her gaze focused on Cal.

Perhaps she had never seen his nasty streak before.

"Edward and I were talking," I defended him. "What would you have me do? Be rude and ignore him? One moment you want me to be polite and the next you want me to be rude. There really is no winning, is there?"

"Your defiance is persistent, Emily. I shall give you that," Cal said. "Why do you feel as though you should speak to a serving boy? There are plenty of people on this ship to speak with."

"And the ones you would prefer me to speak with are beyond boring," I complained to him. "I fail to care what shade of pink goes best with my hair. I fail to care how to behave like a proper woman. If being with Edward is the only form of relief then I am willing to take it."

"You've known the boy one day," Cal said in disbelief.

"And he has been the most interesting person I have met in the past day," I said. "Honestly, you know how to make a mountain out of a mole hill, don't you?"

"You're not see him again. I do not need you tarnishing the Hockley reputation," Cal informed me and I scoffed.

"I am twenty years old," I reminded him. "You cannot tell me what to do, Cal. You cannot tell me how to behave."

"I am your brother and I can," Cal snapped at me and I shook my head. "Do you not understand that you are to be engaged? You cannot be running around with servants like some common whore. Unless that is what you want to be?"

"You bastard!" I snapped at him and he shook his head. I felt a tear escape my eye. Since when did Cal turn into this? Since when did he become so controlling and hateful? "I am to go back and marry a man who I do not know! I am to spend years being willing and submissive and that is not what I want! I don't want to marry him! I want...I want to go back to Cambridge...I want everything to be as it was two years ago!"

"Grow up, Emily," he urged me, stepping forwards and running his hand down the back of my head, cupping it as his fingers curled into my hair. "I know you are scared, sister. I know you are worried. Mother and father will have found you a nice man. They will have found you someone to take care of you well. Trust me; running around with strangers is not the answer to your problems. It may make you feel better, but it is not ladylike."

Rose remained silent the entire time Cal stood in front of me, holding me firmly in place, his fingers moving and tickling against my skin. He took a deep breath, looking across to Rose for a moment.

"Leave us for a moment, Rose," he urged her. She nodded and moved to the private promenade whilst Cal placed his other hand on my cheek sweetly. He looked me in the eye, taking a deep breath before a small smile fell on his face.

I could see that he was desperately trying to reign in his emotions of anger. He was trying to control himself in front of me for he didn't often enjoy showing his nasty streak to me. Yet it had been something which I had become accustomed to in the past week in his company.

"I know that you are scared," Cal said. "Rose knew me before our marriage was arranged. You are going into the unknown...and...marriage is not something which you will be suited to. I know that."

I nodded in agreement, wondering if he was going to come to my rescue. I wondered if he was going to tell our parents that this marriage wouldn't work. Perhaps he was going to be the brother I had known.

"But marriage is necessary," Cal informed me. "You will have children and you will be the most envied girl in Philadelphia. You are beautiful, Emily. You have a future ahead of you which is expected of you. You don't want to disappoint out parents, do you?"

"Of course not, but-"

"-There you go then," Cal said, refusing to listen to me anymore. He pressed his lips on my forehead, holding me tight to him for a moment as I closed my eyes. He wasn't going to listen. I doubted he cared. He moved his thumbs to wipe away my tears before stepping back for a moment.

"You need to ready yourself for dinner. We are dining with some others from first class. You need to make a good impression on them if you are to be accepted into their circle after such a long time away from it."

"Do you ever listen to me?" I wondered from him as he poured himself a whiskey. He kept his back to me as I glared at him.

"Of course I do," he promised me. "But I know better than you, Emily. You're simply scared. That is all it is. You'll get over the fear soon enough."

I said nothing, turning on my heel and storming out from the room, slamming the door behind me as I went. I trudged across the hall back to my own room, opening the door and closing it quickly.

"I have your gown laid out for tonight, Miss Emily," Mary informed me as soon as I had closed the door. She looked at me, her eyes narrowing at my obvious frustrated appearance.

"Thank you, Mary," I said.

"Is everything alright, Miss?" she wondered cautiously.

"No," I admitted to her. "And it won't be for a long time unless I find a way out of this mess."

...

A/N: Ee! Five reviews for the first chapter! Thank you to lynn from pa, ArtyLou, cassie, et-spiritus-sancti and yruniwylio for reviewing! Please do keep letting me know what you think!


	3. Chapter 3

I couldn't sleep. No matter how hard I tried, sleep would not find me. I groaned into my pillow, finally deciding to simply get up. I turned the light on and looked to the clock which informed me it was four o'clock in the morning. I grabbed a simple dress which I could wear without the aid of Mary to help me into it. I looked at the corset and shook my head, choosing to stay in my underclothes and place the pink material over my head.

The thought of Cal's conversation with me still rung fresh in my ears and anger course through my body. A part of me had honestly thought that he was going to stop the marriage from going through. I thought he was going to help me. But he didn't. He simply tried to soothe me to make things feel better. It didn't work. He'd only just annoyed me even more.

I had it in my mind to tell him how his beloved Rose detested him. She didn't want to marry him, that much was obvious. But I had kept my mouth shut, deciding not to get her into trouble anymore than I had been in. Cal wasn't the kind of man who took kindly to having things go against him. I knew that, and Rose didn't deserve to suffer because of my big mouth.

Once I had slipped my shoes on I left the cabin, quietly locking the door behind me and making my way down the corridors. The ship hardly rocked from side to side, the water still around it. I found myself on the empty boat deck once again, no one there in the cold night air. I instantly wished I had worn a coat, but I ignored the cold for the time being.

I'd spent years learning about something which would not be relevant in my life now I was to be married. It had all been pointless. I'd managed to buy time, yes, but I could never do what I wanted to.

"Miss Emily."

I turned around, the sight of Edward stood there shocking me to death. I felt my heart race as I leant my back against the railings, watching as he stood before me, his eyes intent and focused.

"Edward," I spoke. "What are you doing here? Everyone is sleeping."

"Sleep sometimes doesn't come easy to me," he admitted to me, walking closer to the railing. He stood next to me and I noted a small red book held in his hands. I looked at it with wonder for a moment, intrigue taking hold of me. "I couldn't sleep when I knew that I'd managed to get you into trouble."

"I'm in trouble with Cal on a regular basis, Edward," I assured him. "Trust me, today is no different."

"You must be freezing, Miss," he spoke, removing the white jacket which he wore. He draped it over my shoulders and I gave him a thankful smile. He returned it before looking back to the sea before him. "You shouldn't be out here in the dark."

"I'm fine," I promised him. "I couldn't sleep too. I needed fresh air. I just didn't expect to find you out here."

"Our Lord works in mysterious ways," Edward said and I snorted. Of course he would think that fate had brought us together. I shook my head back and forth, leaning against the railing once again as he turned to look back down at me. "I truly am sorry for what happened."

"Do you do anything apart from apologise to me?" I wondered from him simply. His lips turned up at hearing that but he said nothing for a moment, clearly unsure of how to answer the question in query. "Anyway, what were you doing out here?"

"It's silly, Miss," he informed me and I shook my head.

"I shall be the judge of that," I said and he looked at me with wide eyes, clearly shocked at my stubborn behaviour. He held the red book up, handing it across to me. I took it, slowly opening it and looking down at the words which sat there. I flicked through the pages, quite shocked with what I was seeing. My own orbs widened and I looked back at his green gaze before he laughed loudly at the sight of me.

"You don't need to look so shocked, Miss Emily," he informed me and I shook my head, my black curls bouncing around my shoulders as I did so.

"You write?" I wondered from him. He let out a nonchalant shrug in reply to me.

"I taught myself how to write and read when I was working as a waiter. You have to learn all these names of fancy foods...I thought I could teach myself. It took me years."

"And are these short stories?" I wondered, reading down a page. He nodded in agreement with me, pointing his finger at the page which I was on.

"That was my second story," he said. "It's about a gal being kidnapped by a stone statue. Her fiancé tries to rescue her but he needs the help of the entire realm."

"Did he get to her?" I asked him. He smiled softly, taking the book back from my hand and nodding at me whilst the wind blew through his blonde hair.

"He got to her. But, he didn't save her. He refused to fight the statue. The young knight did and he saved her," Edward said and I found myself wanting to read the story and his other works. He seemed like he had quite the imagination. That was something which I had always lacked. Imagination had never been my forte. I was practical and unable to believe in stories with mythical creatures.

"Did she marry her fiancé?" I wondered. "He seems like quite a coward."

"Oh, he was a horrible man, Miss," Edward promised me. "She ran away with the knight. They moved to another realm and lived together and had many children."

"And does every story have a happy ending?" I asked him. He shook his head, running a hand through his hair.

"It is impractical for every story to have a happy ending. Not everyone gets what they want. Tragedy happens. I know that as well as many others."

"I suppose you do," I agreed, thinking about what he had said about his parents and the way in which he had been raised. I kept quiet for a few moments, the wind blowing around us and causing me to hold onto the lapels of his jacket tighter than before.

"But I suppose there isn't that issue in first class, is there?" Edward said, his voice holding a teasing edge to it as he spoke. I looked at him, my lips unable to rise into a smile. "Everyone seems so happy with each other."

"Is that what you see?" I wondered in a small whisper. "Do you honestly think they are happy? Most of them are very good actors. Of course, the money does make things easier. But some of them do not want to be there. The young girls being forced to be proper...the women whose husbands are two times their age...do you honestly think they're happy?"

"Perhaps not," Edward agreed with my analysis. "I know that you're definitely unhappy."

"Do you?" I wondered.

"You wouldn't be out here at four o'clock in the morning if you were happy," he said to me and I supposed he had a point. I shook my head, agreeing with what he had said before bowing my head.

"You're right," I admitted to him. "I'm not happy. I've spent three years being so happy in Cambridge. I've learnt so much. Why do I need to know Roman architecture now? It won't help me to run a happy household."

"Run away." He said it as if it were so simply. I chuckled at hearing him, shaking my head back and forth and looking to the sea once more. He looked at me, his own smile held on his face as he did so. I said nothing for a moment as he shrugged.

"It's easy," he promised me. "You get off this ship and you leave."

"Have you met my brother?" I asked from him. "Cal has his eye on me like a hawk. I'd never make it far. I have no money to help me survive."

"You could earn some," he told me. "If you are so against going to an arranged marriage then you should run."

"It really isn't that easy," I told him. He shrugged nonchalantly at me, flipping through his book as he did so. "What are you doing when we dock?"

"Going back on the Titanic to England. I'm hoping that I'll be able to keep my job."

"And what about your writing?" I wondered from him. "You clearly have imagination."

"I have no contacts," he told me and shook his head sadly, looking into the air around us. "It's a dream. Dreams don't come true for boys like me."

"They don't exactly come true for girls like me," I promised him. "It would seem that we're both in the same boat."

"Titanic is a ship, Miss Emily," he told me.

"I know," I said. "I meant in the same boat as in a..." I trailed off, fully aware that he had been mocking me. I rolled my eyes, moving my hand to hit him across the arm. He shook his head at the motion as I haughtily looked back to the sea but laughed once again.

"You really are a special gal, Miss Emily," Edward told me simply. I looked to him again, nodding once.

"You're not too bad yourself," I assured him. "Anyway, I should be returning to my cabin. No doubt Mary will be there to wake me soon. Cal's requested I have breakfast with him this morning. I assume he will want to scold me some more."

"He doesn't treat you like I would treat my sister," Edward shook his head. "Does he know that you don't want this marriage?"

"He knows, he just doesn't care," I replied quickly, looking to the ocean once more before turning around. I shrugged my shoulders out from his jacket. Handing the material back to him. He draped it over his arm and I looked at him for a moment.

"Can I see you again?" he asked from me. "If it doesn't get you into trouble then I'd like to."

"I fear that Cal will be watching me all the time," I said.

"He's not watching you now."

"True," I agreed with him. "I suppose so," I said after a moment, sighing as I did so. "Tonight when he's gone to bed, I'll be here."

"Yes, Miss Emily."

"And if you're going to keep seeing me then you can call me Emily," I said and he nodded in agreement.

"As you wish, Emily," he said and I nodded.

"Anyway...goodnight, Edward...well...no...good morning," I stammered and he laughed as I walked backwards from him, pushing my hair from my face as it persisted in blowing into my eyes. I could make out the sun rising in the distance, lighting the day once more.

"Good morning, Emily," Edward bowed his head and he walked away from me. I smiled at him, turning around and making my way to my cabin.

I came to the private corridor which Cal had with our cabins on. I began to walk down it, minding my own business before I heard a voice.

"It seems you've become quite the wanderer on this ship."

I turned around to see Lovejoy following me, his footsteps faster than mine. I resisted the urge to just walk away from him, knowing full well that he would only tell Cal of my bad behaviour.

"I couldn't sleep and so I went for some fresh air. What is your excuse for roaming around?"

"Your brother asked me to come early. Apparently we have business to discuss. Why don't you join us? I am sure he will be interested to hear why you're awake."

"It really isn't an interesting topic," I replied to him with a shake of my head. "Now, if you want to tell Cal that I have been with the servant then go ahead. Make up some lie of how he spent the entire night ravishing me."

"I don't lie, Miss Hockley," he informed her. "I simply tell Mr Hockley what I see."

"Really?" I wondered from him. "Then you should go to him. You'd hate to keep him waiting."

"That big mouth of yours is going to get you into trouble one day, Miss Hockley. And when it does then others may not be as lenient on you as your brother is."

I scoffed at hearing that, opening the door to my cabin and turning to look at him one more time. I thought of saying something but I knew it would more than likely get me into trouble with Cal. I shut the door and spent the rest of the morning leant against the wood, thinking about Edward.

...

Breakfast was a torrid affair. Cal sat opposite me. Rose had left us, insisting that she should dine with her mother. I had almost looked at her pleadingly, willing for her not to go. I knew it was bad. It was a sad affair not wanting to be left alone with my own brother. But he had done nothing but torment me during the entire trip.

"Did you sleep well?" Cal asked me, sipping on his orange juice. I picked up a slice of toast, spreading jam over it as he watched me intently.

"I suppose Lovejoy told you that I was wandering around this morning," I said. Cal chuckled at hearing that, shaking his head and arching a brow as he leant forwards for a piece of toast.

"He mentioned something," Cal said. "He said that you weren't exactly polite. He blamed it on your lack of sleep."

"That's decent of him," I said, my voice betraying my sentence. "There's nothing to worry about. I couldn't sleep and so I went for some fresh air."

"I have some nights like it," Cal said. "I do hope it wasn't our previous conversation which kept you awake."

"No," I lied to him. "I don't know what it was."

"The servant?"

"No," I lied again. "I think you've taunted Edward enough, haven't you? The poor boy won't be able to sleep for days on end as long as you're on this ship."

"It is as much as he deserves," Cal said to me. I said nothing, biting into my toast. I slumped back in my seat, crumbs dropping to my lap.

"You are not a university student now, Emily," Cal scolded me. "Sit up like the lady mother raised you to be."

I did as was asked after a few moments of suffering Cal and his glare. I leant forwards again, placing the toast back onto the plate before deciding to plead with my brother one more time.

"Cal," I spoke, "I know I have not been the most dutiful sister."

"No, you have not," Cal agreed with me, intrigue clearly taking hold of him. He said nothing, choosing to hold onto his glass of orange juice as he watched me speak. I looked down into my lap for a moment, biting down on my bottom lip before deciding to bite the bullet and speak to him.

"But there is a reason for that, Cal," I said. "It is the thought of marrying. The thought of marrying a man who I don't know scares me."

"We have had this discussion, Emily," Cal groaned.

"I know," I said to him. "But, I am scared, Cal. And I know you keep saying that the fear will pass. But I know it won't. I don't want to marry without love."

"Love doesn't buy you nice things," Cal said. "You will grow to love the man who you will marry, Emily."

"But I won't," I complained to him. "I don't want to take the risk. Please, Cal. Please can you not just talk to mother and father? Ask them to give me a chance to find someone who I love?"

"Emily," he complained to me.

"Please, Cal," I urged him again. "You're my brother. You're the only one who I can turn to."

He sighed deeply, placing his orange juice back down again. He shook his head again before running his fingers over his temple.

"I have no control over mother and father," Cal reminded me. "It is not in my place to try and change their minds. I cannot do that. I will go back and I shall see who they have chosen. I shall make sure he is suitable for you. We are not giving you to a man who would hurt you. But, if he is not suitable then I shall speak up."

I said nothing. That wasn't what I had wanted.

"Rose is seventeen, Emily. She is marrying me. You cannot wait too long or you shall be past your best looking. You're still a beautiful woman. There will be many men who would be willing to marry you."

"And I should be grateful," I said, my voice the one of rejection. Cal said nothing to me. He stood up slowly, clearly tiring of my persistent nagging. He moved over to my chair, bending down and wrapping his hands around the arm of the wicker seat. His eyes stared into mine before his hand rested on my cheek.

"I know you think that the end of your life has come," he said to me. I shook my head. He had no idea what I thought. "But this is simply the beginning of a long and happy life. Some serving boy cannot give you that. I do things because I care for you. I may not show it in a manner which soothes you, but I do care for you, Emily."

I said nothing as Cal kissed me on the cheek and stood up again.

"You'll come around soon, Emily," he assured me. "You will have to. There is nothing more to it."

I said nothing, looking to the clock and deciding to count down the hours until I could see Edward once more. Perhaps he had a point. Maybe running away would be the best thing for me to do. Maybe it was the only thing left to do.

...

A/N: So thank you to LadyFides and Mellurker for reviewing the previous chapter! Do let me know what you think!


	4. Chapter 4

"You do look beautiful," Cal spoke as soon as I entered the sitting room which he and Rose stood in. I looked across to her, watching her for a moment as she stood in a long, black gown. I had to admit that she did look radiant. She always seemed to look important and beautiful regardless of any situation.

I forced myself to smile at Cal as he moved across to me, his hands running down my bare upper arms as he smiled, kissing me tenderly on the top of my head. His finger curled under my chin, forcing my gaze to meet his as he smiled warmly at me. Apparently he thought that after the conversation we had previously had then I would be accommodating and pleasant.

Unfortunately he didn't really know me too well. It seemed our time apart had changed us. I supposed it was only inevitable. We were no longer children. We had grown up and Cal had become involved in the family business. It was only then that he had begun to recognise the responsibilities which he had.

I leaned up, pecking his cheek for a moment and then pulling back.

"I feel rather inadequate in comparison to Rose," I admitted. She looked up from the ground she had been staring it as my calling of her name snapped her out of the daydream she appeared to have been stuck in. She politely smiled in my direction, her lips pushed together and the action forced.

"Yes," Cal said, turning his gaze back to his fiancée who he dotingly smiled at. "She does look rather beautiful, doesn't she?"

"Thank you, Emily," Rose politely said, ignoring her own fiancé and the comment which he had made. I nodded back at her, moving closer to her and offering her my own arm. She looked shocked as Cal coughed once and then chuckled as Lovejoy made his appearance known.

"I'll escort your fiancée down to dinner," I declared. "We need a chance to talk with each other considering how, I suppose, you intend to spend your time boring us at dinner."

"Is that proper?" Cal wondered from me, his eyes clearly showing that it was not what he wished to happen. I shrugged nonchalantly as Rose quickly laced her arm into mine, seeming not to mind the fact that it could be seen as improper.

"I doubt anyone would care, Cal," I promised him. "Besides, this way gives you and Lovejoy a chance to talk business."

Cal said nothing further to me as I began to leave the room, Rose lagging behind me as we moved out from the suite and further away from Cal.

"Thank you," she spoke softly.

"I'll try to help you during the voyage," I promised her, wondering where my sudden affection for the younger girl had come from. She was only three years younger than myself; yet she knew how I felt. We were both suffering the same fate. I supposed I wanted to know that I wasn't alone. It was how I felt sometimes. And if Rose was the one to offer that comfort then I would accept it. I would willingly accept it.

"I know that you don't want to marry Cal. I know that this has to be hard. I don't even know who I am to marry but it still hurts. Just remember that I will be here for you so long as you let me." I assured her intently. She looked across to me, her face unreadable as she did so.

"I don't think I've ever had anyone to rely on," Rose informed me simply. "I've always been expected to do things."

"And now I'm coming to terms with that feeling," I admitted, thinking back to how Cal had told me that I was to be dutiful. I was a Hockley. It was expected of me apparently. I tried not to dwell on the thought too much, deciding to go back to forcing myself to smile at Rose. "It's awful, isn't it? I suppose you're luck is lower than mine. At least I managed to spend three years at university."

"Was it exciting?" Rose wondered. "They say women are frowned upon for gaining an education. I can't understand why."

"You're not the only one," I promised as we came to the elevator. I stifled a yawn as I stood and waited for the elevator to be readied. "It was exciting, I suppose. You have to learn to live with men and their constant sneers. They enjoy being able to put you down. You just can't let them. Although, some women are only there to find a husband. Those are the ones who men love. The ones who are there to learn are looked at quite differently."

"Some men just cannot handle a woman who is smart as they are," Rose informed me. "It is something which I have seen a lot of times. Besides, I wanted to apologise for Cal finding you yesterday. I tried to persuade him that a walk wasn't necessary."

"Oh," I said, the incident coming back to my memory. I shook my head at her as the elevator began to move. "Do not worry about that. Cal would have found out anyway. He has Lovejoy keeping his eye on me. He seems to enjoy following me nearly everywhere I go recently. It is rather disturbing."

"He's quite an intimidating man," Rose admitted to me.

The elevator came to a halt and we stepped out, looking around at all of the familiar faces who were making their way to dinner, smiling politely and waving timidly at each other. I could clearly see that most of them didn't want to be there. Deep down who did want to be there? They all spoke behind each other's backs, lied to their faces. It wasn't a world which I wanted to be in.

"Do you think there is more to life than this?" Rose wondered as she stood still for a moment, looking up at me as I dropped my arm from hers. Her face held something other than annoyance and wonder. She looked truly fed up. I shrugged at her, my voice quiet as I spoke to her once again;

"I don't know," I admitted to her. "I do hope so...truly..."

"Have you ever thought of running away from it?" she asked me. I scoffed as a countess passed us, clearly looking at us with an air of disgust at my snort. I supposed it was not considered ladylike. However, I failed to care at the moment in time.

"Edward said I should," I admitted to Rose. "He thinks it is that easy."

"And is it?" Rose wondered. "What would you do? Would you go with him?"

"I barely know him," I mumbled back to Rose, my brow arched in obvious distaste as I did so. She shrugged at me, a small frown on her lips as she did so. "I could hardly go away with him."

"You seemed close to him," Rose admitted to me. "I saw the way he looked at you. He has clearly taken a fancy to you."

I shook my head, continuously scanning the room as I noted Cal stood with Rose's mother, his gaze set on us as we stood close together, whispering in the corner of the room.

"I doubt it," I said to her. "I have agreed to meet with him tonight...he's the most interesting person I have met on this ship since I arrived here. No offence, Rose."

"None taken," she promised me simply. "Just try to be careful. Edward has given you a sense of joy...don't lose it...but don't let it get you into trouble."

I said nothing for a moment, watching as she walked away from me, her face clearly showing her distaste of being there for the meal. She moved over to her mother, whispering with the noble members of first class as Cal excused himself, moving over to talk to me.

"You should converse," he urged me. I rolled my eyes at hearing him, reaching for a champagne glass as it passed on the tray of a dutiful waiter. "These are people who you will need to know soon, Emily."

I said nothing to him, watching as he brushed a loose stand of hair from my face in a moment of affection. He smiled down at me, the look cold and calculating. My eyes looked away from his intrusive stare as I saw the blonde haired man stood by a long serving trolley, his eyes downcast and set on the task in front of him. Placing the flute to my lips, I watched as Cal followed my gaze.

I turned away from looking at the boy as soon as I knew Cal had been watching me. Moving slowly, I walked away from him, trying to make my escape. It didn't work for Cal had his hand wrapped around my elbow in a matter of seconds.

"What have I told you before?" he wondered from me as we walked through the crowds of people.

"I was simply shocked to see him still serving here," I lied to my brother, widening my eyes and staring up at him in the hope that he would buy the story which I had convened. "Did I not promise that I would be dutiful?"

He stood in front of me, his eyes looking me up and down with blatant suspicion. I arched a brow in his direction, waiting for him to say something to me.

"Behave." That was on the only word which Cal offered to say to me. The need to roll my eyes overcame me as he took my hand and placed it on his arm. I walked with him to the dining table, allowing him to pull my chair out for me as I took a seat next to him and Mr Andrews.

The entire ordeal was a bore. Everyone sat there, looking and laughing at each other as they discussed their own merits. Not once did anyone enquire how Rose or I felt about anything. We were ignored as if we had no place at the table. It only took until the main course for Rose to declare she had become tired and didn't feel too well. She stood up as Cal did the same, looking at her and resting his hand on her shoulder.

I noted the way she had gulped, shaking her head and insisting that everything was fine. Her face was paler than usual, her eyes full of something I had never seen before. It was a look of desperation.

I knew something wasn't right as she stormed out of the dining hall, no one seeming to mind too much. Cal sat back down next to me, holding his champagne flute to his lips as I looked at him.

"Did she seem a little on edge to you?" I wondered, watching and waiting for my brother to answer. His stern gaze moved down and found my eyes, a look of boredom held on his face. He shook his head at me, draining some of the alcohol quickly.

He smacked his lips together, rubbing his napkin along his mouth before speaking; "Rose is fine. She said she was ill and she was going back for some fresh air and to sleep."

"I'll go and check up on her," I said. Cal shook his head at me, his hand moving to my shoulder and urging me not to make a move to stand.

"I told you that she would be fine. Besides, you need to socialise, Emily. You have done nothing to try and enter the conversation."

"I'm going to go and find her," I simply decided to say to him. Pushing myself to my feet, I ignored Cal as he pleasantly urged me to sit down.

I wandered off, walking out of the dining hall and back to the main corridor where I saw him walking with a bottle of champagne in his hands. Another waiter was by his side, walking slowly by him as the pair of them muttered under their breath. It took only a moment for his head to snap up and his eyes to find mine.

"Miss," he spoke, the other waiter looking at him as if he were wishing for some form of suicide. "Are you well?"

I glanced at the other waiter, bowing my head and urging him to leave. He did so in a moment before I found myself alone with Edward in the deserted corridor.

"Rose was ill," I said to him. "But she...there was something else..." I explained.

"I saw her walking back this way," he told me. "She looked flustered."

"Look...Edward..." I whispered to him. "If I can't make it tonight then you know where I am, don't you?"

"With Miss DeWitt Bukater," he said and I smiled at him. I moved my gloved hand out, wrapping it around his arm for a moment and holding tightly to him.

"Thank you," I said.

"What for, Miss Emily?"

I stumbled for a moment. What was I thanking him for? Being the only one sane enough to keep me on this ship? Being the only one able to keep my sanity in check?

"For everything you have done," I said. "I should go and find Rose."

"As you wish, Miss Emily," I said and he bowed slightly as I turned on my heel and moved off down the corridor.

"Oh, Miss Emily," he called after me. I turned back around, looking at him and waiting for a response. "If you can't make it tonight then don't worry...but...it would have been real nice to see you..." he trailed off, a small blush coming over his skin.

I threw him a smile, walking backwards down the hall as he gazed on.

"Hopefully I will be there," I promised him. "Goodnight, Edward."

"Goodnight, Miss Emily," he replied.

Some form of grin found its own way onto my face, making me become some kind of fool for a boy. Never before did I think that this would be probable. I shook it from my thoughts, knowing full well that I had a larger task at hand. I walked back to Rose's own room, knocking on the suite door only to find the room completely deserted.

"Rose?" I called inside, questioning her and willing for her to come out. "Rose, are you in here?"

I moved through the suite to the bedroom she resided in. All of the lights were still on yet Rose was nowhere to be seen. Shaking my head back and forth, I moved out of her room, wandering down the halls before coming back to the dining room.

"Cal," I whispered his name, my hand resting on his shoulder as he turned around to look at me. I bent down by his chair, my pink dress getting in the way under my feet as I looked at him.

"What is it?" he wondered, clearly agitated that I had interrupted him and the conversation he was having with the man to his left.

"Rose is not in her room," I explained. "I cannot find her."

"What do you mean 'you cannot find her'?" Cal wondered and I frowned at him, standing up again as he did so, pushing his chair back and looking at me for a moment.

The men began to stand up, making their own way back to the parlour for brandy and drinks. Rose's mother seemed completely lost with what was happening, choosing to walk alongside the countess as they decided to go for a stroll around the boat deck.

"I thought it was self-explanatory," I replied which earned me a look of discontent.

Lovejoy came to stand beside Cal, watching me with intrigue before looking back to his employer.

"Is everything alright?" he wondered.

"Find Rose," Cal demanded instantly, a hand moving to his forehead and running along it.

"I'll go too," I declared. "She could be anywhere on this ship."

"Do not wander too far," Cal demanded from me. I said nothing in response, leaving the dining hall before I noted Edward. He was wandering down the corridor, his hands in his pockets and his bowtie undone around his neck, a few buttons to his dress shirt undone. Apparently he had finished for the evening.

"Miss," he spoke as soon as he saw me.

"Rose is missing," I blurted out to him. "I need to find her?"

"Have you raised the alarm?" he wondered. I shook my head at him. "Cal probably has that covered now." I promised him. He said nothing to me, running a hand through his hair as he did so.

"I'll help you look," he assured me. I shook my head quickly, my hair falling back and forth over my shoulders as I made the motion.

"You can't," I declared. "If Cal sees-"

"-I am sure your brother is far more concerned over getting his fiancée back, isn't he?" he wondered from me. I bit down on my lip, holding my hand out for him to take. He looked at it for a moment, his gaze clearly wondering whether I was joking or not. I shook my head, snatching his hand into mine before dragging him down the corridors.

"Miss, this is hardly proper," he complained to me. I shook my head, failing to care about properness as we came to the boat deck. The cold wind hit me quickly, the breeze chilly against my bare skin which was not covered with my gloves. Edward looked around, waiting for a sight to be seen.

And then we saw it. She stood on the railings, her body turned to face a man who was helping her to climb back over them.

"How the hell did she get there?" Edward wondered as we both stood against the barrier, watching the scene unfold before us. My blood instantly ran cold as I saw her begin to climb back to the safety of the ship, willing her to hurry up and be quick about it. She did as I had pleaded, her own body moving up the railings until she fell back.

"Rose!" I screamed out loud. Edward jumped forwards, running down the steps which led to the lower deck. I followed him, my feet not as fast as his. His body hit the barrier and his hands outstretched downwards, willing for Rose to take the help which he was offering her.

"Come on, Miss," Edward urged as I stood back, watching as Edward and the other blonde boy helped to haul her back onto the boat. She tumbled backwards, falling against the boy who had originally helped her whilst Edward bent over, heaving and panting.

"What were you doing?" I snapped at Rose as the boy climbed off of her.

"Stand back, all of you." A new voice joined the congregation. Edward's hand wrapped around my elbow, hauling me back to stand in front of him as the men before us looked at the sight of Rose on the floor, her body completely paralysed with shock and adrenaline. It took me a moment before I realised what the men were thinking and I shook my head.

"Call the master at arms," one declared.

"No," I shook my head. "It wasn't like that at all."

"She's right," Edward defended the boy who was stood now, his wrists being bound in chains as I bent down, helping Rose to sit up. She said nothing to me as I rested a hand on her back and the other on her forehead, checking her temperature.

"What were you doing?" I hissed. She looked at me, her eyes vacant and full of worry. I knew that I didn't need to ask. Rose had known exactly what she had been doing. She had tried to jump. The boy had saved her somehow, persuaded her not to do it.

I doubted Cal would be forgiving if he found out. I shook my head, moving to help her stand up as Edward loitered in the background. I guided Rose away from the back of the ship, walking with her until we came to the benches. She sat down as the officers looked at each other, waiting for the relevant people to turn up.

"Edward," I suddenly whispered his name once I had wrapped a blanket around Rose, making sure she would warm up. He nodded at me, a look of understanding passing between us.

"I'll say nothing," he promised me.

"You should go," I urged him, not wanting Cal to see his face and become angry. I knew it would happen. This was Cal. Edward shook his head at me as the master at arms spoke too;

"You're going nowhere, boy. You'll wait until Mr Hockley arrives here and then you can say what happened. You too, Miss Hockley."

I groaned as I heard that, stood to the side of Edward as he bent down to whisper in my ear;

"What are the chances of your brother killing me?" he wondered. I shrugged nonchalantly at hearing that, not too sure of what the chances were.

"Probably better than the boy over there," I admitted to him. He groaned under his breath as I moved my hand out, resting it on his arm for a moment before I heard footsteps moving towards us. Edward instantly shrugged my hand off, his own moving behind his back as Cal looked down at Rose. He bent down to her height, his hand on her cheek as another man handed her a brandy for her nerves.

"Rose...sweet pea..." Cal spoke soothingly. "What has happened to you, dear?"

"That would be the boy," the master at arms spoke, stepping forwards and moving closer to Cal. His gaze was firmly set on the young blonde and I wondered if he was going to rip him to shreds right then and there. "We found him with Miss DeWitt Bukater...your sister and the serving boy were with them too."

"Emily," Cal turned his gaze to me before seeing Edward stood behind. He blinked profusely, a smile of disbelief moving to rest on his face. I bit down on my bottom lip, holding it tightly in between my teeth. The look on his face was enough to tell me that I was in deep trouble.

"Yes, sir," the master spoke again.

"I see," Cal replied and then turned back to the young blonde, anger fully on his face as he did so. "And what makes you think you can put your hands on my fiancée?" Cal demanded as the boy looked at Rose, his gaze firm and annoyed with the red head. "Look at me, you filth."

"Rose," I pleaded her before she stood up quickly.

"Cal," she demanded him. "Stop it."

Cal turned back to look at her, waiting intently for an explanation from her. As was I. I would make sure that I got one too. Seeing Rose almost plummet to her death was something which scared me senseless. Never before had I considered it possible for her to contemplate taking her own life because of her marriage.

Was she that desperate?

"It was an accident," Rose spat out. My brow widened and I heard Edward shift his footing next to me.

"An accident?" Cal repeated.

"Yes," Rose said. "I was leaning over too far to look at the...uh...well...the uh..." she made a swirling motion with her finger as Cal's brows arched further up his forehead.

"The propellers?" he wondered from her.

"Yes." She instantly spoke. "The propellers. And I would have gone overboard if Mr Dawson here didn't save me."

I began to wonder how she had managed to get away with it as all of the men begun to congratulate the boy. I turned my gaze up to Edward, looking at him and urging him to leave in the midst of the commotion which was happening.

"You should leave now," I urged him. "Cal's in a bad mood. You don't want to bear the brunt of it."

"And what about you?" I wondered. I saw something which looked like concern flicker over his face. I shook my head back and forth.

"I'll be fine," I promised him. "He's not going to hurt me, is he?"

"Emily," Cal called over to me. I looked across to him as he had his arm wrapped around Rose. The red head turned to look at me, her face pleading and full of worry as she did so. "Go with Lovejoy back to your cabin."

The demand didn't fall on deaf ears. I nodded sternly at Edward, pushing my body away from all of them and towards Lovejoy who was waiting with anticipation. I could feel Edward's gaze watching me as the bodyguard spoke to Mr Dawson very quickly.

"Come along, Miss Hockley," he demanded from me. I moved by his side, trying to keep up with his long strides as I did so.

"You and I both know the story which Miss DeWitt Bukater told is a lie," he informed me. I arched a brow, shaking my head and keeping my eyes straight ahead as he turned to look down at me.

"Honestly, I do not have any idea what you are talking about," I assured him. "I only managed to see Mr Dawson help Rose. There is nothing else to it. What are you implying?"

"Nothing, Miss Hockley," he promised me simply. "I am implying nothing. Although it is curious how you and the serving boy seemed to be there in time. Mr Hockley shall not be impressed with that."

"I am sure my brother will think nothing of it," I said snidely. "He has Rose safe and sound. I merely asked Edward for help to find her. What is it with your suspicious mind, Mr Lovejoy?"

He said nothing then, a snarl forming on the corner of his lips as I finally came to my cabin. I opened the door, leaving Lovejoy stood in the corridor as I slammed the door shut. I looked around for Mary, but she seemed to be missing. I supposed it was past her bed time. Besides, I didn't require her assistance all of the time like others requested of their maids.

I pulled the strings of my dress before I heard a knock on the door. I stopped for a moment, my hand moving to my chest to hold the material in place as it loosened around my body.

"Cal," I spoke. "How is Rose?"

"Shaken up," he replied. "She has gone to bed without another word. I suppose I am lucky that the boy was there to save her."

"I should suppose so," I agreed limply with him. He looked at me questioningly as I pulled at my dress, trying to keep it up and on my body. He looked at me for a moment and I wondered what he wanted from me at this time of the night. I could have a good guess.

"Why were you with the serving boy?" he wondered from me.

"Honestly, Cal," I snapped. "Your fiancée almost falls to her death and you come here to ask me what I was doing with Edward?"

I glared at him for a moment, moving around my room to busy myself. Anything to stop me from raging at him. How could he think of me at a time like this?

"I saw how you looked at him," Cal said. "Earlier in the dining hall, you couldn't take your eyes from him. And now I find you lurking with him when my fiancée almost drowns."

"I asked him for help!" I snapped at him.

Cal chuckled, his hand pushing through his hair and his head shaking back and forth.

"Coincidental," he decided to say.

"Not really," I replied bluntly. "So there really is no reason for us to have this conversation."

"I think there is," Cal replied, sitting down in the chair which resided in the corner of my room. The urge to roll my eyes came over me. I said nothing, choosing to remain quiet for a few moments as Cal crossed his legs, one over the other with his hand holding his chin.

"Cal," I complained to him. "I'm tired. Please, can we discuss this another time? Just because I look at someone, that does not mean I have taken a fancy to them. Honestly, I told you that I would behave."

He took a deep breath, his hand running over his forehead as he did so. I remained stood where I was, my face showing no sign of emotion. I didn't want him thinking anything other than what I had said.

"You're tired," I decided to say. "Now is not the time for this conversation. You know that and I know that."

"You've changed, Emily," he declared. "I left you in England three years ago. I left you as a meek and mild girl...someone who wanted to study...burying your head in books."

I kept quiet, watching as Cal stood back up, looking at me with intent.

"You're not that girl anymore, are you?" he replied. "You're a young woman. You're a young, independent woman. Someone who knows what they want in life. Someone who thinks it is fine for defiance to occur."

"Cal," I complained to him, my voice low and pleading.

He took another step closer to me, his hand resting on my hair at the side of my face. I remained stood where I was, both of my hands holding my dress. He looked down at me, his eyes wide as he did so.

"You know that I love you, Emily," he said softly. "I want the best for you. And I know that the best will be waiting in Philadelphia for you. You need to become the dutiful little sister who you were once before."

I gulped once, my throat tightening as he reminded me what was going to happen back in Philadelphia. The thought that I was to become a loving wife to a man who I did not know. And Cal failed to care what I truly wanted.

"Get some sleep," Cal said to me. "I hope I was overreacting about earlier and the serving boy."

"You were," I muttered. He kissed me on the cheek, leaving the room without another word. I sunk down onto my bed, thinking of what he had said.

I didn't want to be the girl who I was three years ago. I didn't really want to be her three years ago. I felt trapped. Suffocated. Is that how Rose felt when she was hanging off the back of the ship? Was that how I would feel when I finally found out who I was to marry. I shook my head, the thought incomprehensible to me. I stood back up, awkwardly looking into the mirror and lacing myself back into my dress.

I didn't want that life. I didn't want to become Rose.

And so I did the only thing which I felt I could do. I ran and left in hope that Edward would be on the boat deck.

...

A/N: We're now into the main storyline! I cannot wait. Anyway, thank you to et-spirtus-sancti, LadyFides and SARAHBABE215 for reviewing! Do let me know what you think!


	5. Chapter 5

I sat on the deckchair beside Edward. He continued to push his blonde hair behind his ears as the wind had other ideas and kept pushing it back into his face. He sat close to me, his jacket around my shoulders once again as I had been foolish enough not to bring my own coat.

"So what is going to happen to the woman?" I asked him as I finished reading the sentence which he had left hanging. I closed the red book which he had given me. He shrugged at me, his eyes gazing down at me intensely. I continued to stare at him as he leant forwards, his arms resting on his thighs.

"It depends," he replied back to me. "She has two choices, doesn't she? She could accept her fate and wait for the sun to rise. If she does that then she is bound to be shattered. She cannot live in the sunlight. Or she could run and try to make it to the man she loves before it is too late for her. She can either accept her fate or try to change it."

"Why does she have to die in the sunlight?" I wondered from him.

"Because she is a star. She's a star in the middle of an open field. There is no hope of her surviving once the sun rises," he explained to me as if it were comprehensible. I nodded at him, opening the book again and looking down at the words which sat there.

"Surely it depends on what you want to happen to her," I reasoned with him. "You're the one who can let her live. You are the author."

He smiled at hearing that, sitting straight once more before moving to the side, his gaze glancing at me.

"What do you think should happen?" he wondered from me.

Pointing to my chest, I remained shocked that he would ever ask for my opinion. Never before had I been imaginative. It had never been a trait of mine. My parents had been thankful for that. I doubt they could have coped with me having my head in the clouds. I know I sometimes wished I could. But I had never been a hopeless romantic.

"Well," I said, looking back to the page as Edward intently stared at me, clearly waiting for me to say something in response to him. "She's been through enough already, hasn't she? She fell from her home with her parents and wandered around for days on end before she met him. I know that he is betrothed to another...but surely he will call it off, won't he? He has to. He has to be with her. It is meant to be."

"You would think so," Edward said to me, his grin moving down from his face. "But you know that the world doesn't always work like that."

"But that is why we read stories," I protested to him. "We read them to become lost in their worlds...to escape our own misery..." I trailed off, my own face falling. Edward regarded me for a moment before he held his hand out for the book. I pressed it in his palm as his fingers brushed against mine, a slight shudder coming over my body as I did so.

"Do you read stories?" he wondered.

"I have a feeling that I will be reading a lot in the near future," I complained, thinking of them in a different light. Perhaps I would need to escape from the misery which I was to be in.

"I admit that I don't understand you," Edward said with a disappointed shake of his head. My brow arched as I heard him, wondering what he was speaking of. Why in the name of God would he look so annoyed with me?

I bit down on my lip. "What do you not understand?"

"You're so headstrong," he told me. "You're so forceful...yet...you refuse to run away. You refuse to run from the future which you are scared of."

"How far do you think I would get?" I asked him.

"Who cares?" Edward nonchalantly shrugged at me. I gazed at him with wide eyes, his blasé attitude something which I had never really seen before. "You just go. If you are brought back then at least you can say that you tried."

"Surely that defeats the point?" I wondered. "It would have been pointless to do it in the first place."

"But you tried," he urged me. "And then you run again. There are only so many times you can run before they get the message that you don't want to be with them."

"You haven't met the Hockelys," I told him with a snort.

"No," he agreed. "I haven't. But, I have met one of them. And she is one of the most intelligent, good looking gals I have known. You have so much more to do...so much you say that you want to do. You're not even willing to try."

The words he said stung me slightly. I knew he was right. He was completely right. I was just too scared to run. I was too scared to go, for I did not know what would happen. And fear was something which overcame me in the end.

"What would I do?" I asked him in a whisper.

"You work," he said. "You work your way up. You're a clever gal. You'd find a job eventually which pays well enough."

"Do you think so?" I said. He nodded profusely at me, his hand moving out to brush over my cheek. The motion was bold, yet not unwelcome as he stroked my skin in circles. I felt my eyes drift and close firmly as his skin rested on mine.

"I know so," he assured me. "You get off this boat and you run. Run away from your brother...you just go...they can't control you. You're a grown woman. You're destined for bigger things than this."

"So are you," I said honestly, opening my eyes and looking at him. He snorted once, his head shaking back and forth as he did so. "You're a good writer, Edward. You have much more talent than you give yourself credit for."

"No one would publish someone like me."

"So you offer me advice, yet you refuse to follow your own?" I checked as he dropped his hand down to my chin, his finger curling underneath it delicately. "That doesn't give me much hope to follow your advice."

"I'm trying to help you," he assured me.

"I don't doubt it," I said to him.

"I'll make you a deal," he said to me, his body now fully to the side and facing me. I looked at him intently as he stared into the distance and to the ocean ahead of us. "We both get of this boat together...we get off and we run...somewhere...I don't know where...but we do what we want. We do what we want to and no one can tell us otherwise."

I looked at him, realising that he was fully serious before I laughed loudly. The sound shook as he continued to stare at me, his eyes full of hurt as he tucked his blonde hair behind his ears again. He shook his head at me as I finally controlled myself.

"Edward," I whispered his name, a final laugh of disbelief escaping me. "We hardly know each other. We've just met. Why would you offer to come with me? Why would you want to even bother with me?"

"Because you're like no girl I've met before."

"Exactly," I replied. "Edward, it isn't like you know me. You don't truly know me. You don't know what I am...we hardly know each other."

"We can get to know each other," he said.

"You don't know if you could handle spending time with me," I replied quickly. "We could drive each other mad."

"No offence, Emily," he said. "I doubt you could drive me mad. The only way you drive me mad is by going with the path which has been set for you. From what I have seen of you, you are an amazing gal."

"Edward," I complained to him. "Honestly, you do not know me. I do not know you. We cannot do this."

"We can," he promised me. "Do you want to become like Miss DeWitt Bukater? Do you want to become that desperate for a way out?"

His words haunted me for a moment and I thought deeply for a second. I looked at him again, his eyes held nothing but sincerity. What he was offering was madness, I knew that much. It was complete and utter craziness. We hardly knew each other. It maybe wouldn't work.

But surely it was better than going back home to marry a man who I didn't know. It had to be better than a life full of balls and galas. There was no denying that. And if Edward and I eventually did part then I would be on my own. I would be alone...but I would probably be happier in comparison to having a life in Philadelphia.

He was right. I didn't want to go home. And so I made my decision. It was probably one of the biggest decisions of my life. I didn't know whether it would be the right one or the wrong one. But, I was willing to see what would happen. I was willing to go on a little faith. Recklessness was never something which I had been associated with. It seemed I was going to be just that now.

"If we do this," I said, "then...well...God, I don't even know...we run as far as possible. Hide anywhere."

"Yes," he promised me. "We will do just that, Emily."

"Fine," I said. As soon as I said it I knew it was ridiculous to even begin to explain my logic. I supposed there was none. It was madness. But it was madness which brought a smile to my face. The thought of escaping filled my body with happiness.

"Really?" he checked with me.

"I don't want to go back to Philadelphia," I promised him. "I don't want to go home. I want to try and make something of myself...and if you're willing to come with me...then I won't turn you down. I don't want to turn you down."

He blushed at hearing that, a taunting smile picking up on his lips as he did so. I laughed at the sight as he ran a hand down the back of his neck.

"Some would think that you're becoming too attached to me," he spoke, an air of cockiness about his voice as he did so. I laughed at hearing him, my head shaking back and forth as I did so.

"Don't flatter yourself," I urged him with a grin of my own, nudging him in the ribs as he laughed at me again. I felt a yawn escape my body as Edward stood up, offering me his hand.

"Come on," he urged me simply. "You need a night of rest. I doubt you've hardly slept during this trip."

"You're the waiter who does the work," I reminded him. "You're awake as often as I am."

"That's because I have something to stay awake for," he told me as he held my hand in his, hauling me to my feet. I looked up at him for a moment, wondering if I should say anything in response to his comment. What could I say to that? Words failed to come to my mind.

"You know," I said nervously, "I've never met anyone like you before...someone who...well...flatters me...somewhat...most of the men at university looked at me as if I needed a good husband. And then they found out I wanted to study and became uninterested."

"I'm lucky they didn't know a good thing when they saw her," he said back to me. I suddenly realised he was the confident one in this conversation and I was a total loss. During all of my years, I had never once been kissed. Never once had I been asked to be courted. Nothing had happened to me and I had been fine with that. I had been content with it.

"Do you say that to all the girls?" I asked; my voice shaking as he tucked my hair behind my ears.

"No," he replied nicely. "Only you, it would seem."

"I suppose I should count my blessings then," I whispered and he smirked at that.

"Only if you let me count mine," he said and I rolled my eyes.

"You really are incorrigible," I told him as I felt his hot breath move closer to my face, hitting my cheek and causing my skin to warm underneath his touch as he left his hand on my cheek. He smirked at that as he finally came too close, almost an inch away from my own mouth.

"I doubt you mind," he said confidently before I felt his lips firmly press on mine.

The initial contact caused me to jump back, my heart beat racing as he moved his mouth against mine. My eyes closed on their own account and my chest heaved as I felt one of his hands move to the small of my back, resting there and pushing me closer to him. My body begun to heave with excitement as his other hand rested on the back of my neck.

Never before did I comprehend that anything could feel like _this. _I had never thought it possible. But the way my body was crushed against Edward's body was a feeling I doubted I would tire of. It was amazing in every possible way. He finally pulled his lips from mine, his forehead resting against mine. I heard him chuckle, probably at my current state of hyperventilation.

"Was that too forward?" he asked me. I smirked at that, my own hand going limp on his chest which was covered by his waiter's uniform.

"In every way possible," I admitted to him. "But we're lucky that being forward means nothing to either of us."

"True," he said with a smirk. "Come on, you need to get some sleep so that you don't make your brother suspicious in the morning."

"Cal is suspicious about everything nowadays," I promised Edward. "You have no need to worry about me."

"I do," he promised, offering me his arm. "Allow me to escort you back to your room, Miss Emily."

"It would be a pleasure, Mr Edward," I replied with a dumb smirk on my face.

We both walked back to my cabin, knowing full well that Titanic would dock. And when it did then I would get off with him.

...

"You look very happy with yourself this morning," Cal observed as soon as I entered his suite. He was sat on the chaise longue. I looked around for Rose, knowing that I needed to have a conversation with her. But she wasn't present.

"You do know that you use fewer muscles to smile in comparison to frowning?" I wondered from him. "Perhaps I wish to preserve my good looks for a few more years. Wrinkles are not a woman's friend."

Cal regarded me for a moment as I took a seat opposite him. I leant forwards, pouring myself a glass of orange juice from the glass jug which sat on the coffee table.

"You really are in an odd mood," Cal said, looking at me suspiciously. "What has happened?"

"Nothing," I lied to him. "I slept well for once. It has been the first night since we stepped on this wretched ship. Anyway, I came to see how Rose was after her ordeal last night."

"She has gone for a walk," Cal said. I arched a brow suspiciously as I heard that, wondering who she would have gone with.

"And you don't have your spy following her like he follows me?" I wondered. Cal chuckled, closing the book which he had been reading before he set it down on the side.

"I have faith in Rose," he said to me.

_You shouldn't, _I thought, choosing to keep my own feelings to myself.

"In that case I should go and find her to make sure she is indeed well," I said, standing up and excusing myself from Cal's presence. I couldn't wait to get away from him after our previous conversation from the night before. I wondered if anything would ever be the same between my brother and me. Probably not after I ran away from him.

"Not so fast," Cal said as I drained the orange juice. "I still need to talk with you about last night."

"Why?" I wondered, placing the glass back on the surface of the wood. "I thought we had said enough to each other last night? I told you that there was nothing happening, Cal. Why do you refuse to believe me about this?"

"Because I know what you have turned into, Emily," Cal said. "Please...just...don't try my patience anymore."

"Cal," I complained to him. "I have done nothing. Can we stop this?"

"Yes," he agreed. "But my eye will be on you, Emily. It is not that I don't trust you...the boy is the one who I do not trust."

"Is there any point in arguing with you?" I wondered, already knowing the answer to my question which I had asked him.

"Probably not," he said. I stood up, smoothing the skirt to my dress as I looked at him again.

"I'll be going to find Rose then."

"Yes," he agreed. "Oh, we have Mr Dawson dining with us tonight. It pleased Rose for her saviour to be there. It could be very interesting."

"You don't intend on terrorising the poor boy, do you?" I checked.

A small smirk crossed his face as he picked up his book again, flipping it to the page which he had been reading before.

"I think the mere thought of being civilised will be enough to terrorise him." Cal said, his attention now back on the words in front of him.

I looked at him for a moment, obvious distasted clouding my vision as I wondered what he had become.

...

A/N: So thank you to et-spiritus-sancti and SARAHBABE215 for reviewing the previous chapter for me! Means a lot guys, thanks!


	6. Chapter 6

I found Rose without any difficulty whatsoever. She was walking with her mother as the sun slowly set over the horizon, hiding beneath the sea before us. She walked arm in arm with her mother as she was being scolded for something which she had done. Apparently a lady should not spit.

I blinked profusely as I caught up with them, my hand tapping her mother on the shoulder for a moment. The elder woman turned to look at me, a glance of disgust on her face as she did so. I smiled politely as she smiled back at me, obviously keen to give into any Hockley request.

"Mrs DeWitt Bukater," I spoke. "Would I be able to speak with Rose for a moment? I need to ask her a question regarding what to wear for this evening. I am afraid my maid has no idea."

Ruth smiled widely in agreement, clearly happy that her daughter was associating with the sister of her fiancé.

"Of course, Miss Hockley," she spoke. "I shall meet you in the lounge before dinner, shall I?"

"Perfect," I smiled softly before taking hold of Rose's arm. I laced it into mine before moving off down the corridors, keeping my mouth shut as people passed us and offered us smiles of politeness.

"I assume your real reason for kidnapping me is nothing to do with what to wear for dinner," Rose spoke to me. I scoffed lightly as we finally came to my cabin. I opened the door and found Mary stood by my wardrobe, her hands holding multiple dresses in her long fingers.

"Mary," I spoke politely. "May you leave us be for a moment? Go and take a break for a few moments."

"As you wish, Miss Hockley," she agreed quickly. She dropped into a curtsey and left us alone in my room.

I released Rose's arm and moved to my own wardrobe, pulling dresses out myself to try and find something to wear. I waited for Rose to say something, not entirely trusting myself not to yell at her for her act the previous night.

"Is this about last night?" Rose asked from me.

"It is," I agreed, my voice calmer than I felt. "What were you doing, Rose? Did you know what would happen?"

"I knew," Rose said. "I...I was sat there...Emily...I could take no more. I cannot handle anymore conversation...a life in a loveless marriage...I felt as though there was no other way out."

"There is always a way out," I promised her, thinking of what I had promised Edward. I had promised to run away with him. God, I must be foolish. Or desperate. "Did you honestly think suicide was the way out?"

She sighed then, settling down in the armchair in the corner of my room. I watched as she sunk into the plush material, waiting for an explanation of some kind. I sunk down onto my bed, watching her as she rested her hand on her forehead.

"No," she admitted to me. "I would not have jumped."

"Because of your own decision or the man who is dining with us tonight?" I asked her.

"Both," she admitted. "Jack told me that I did not want to do it. He saved me, Emily. I thanked him this afternoon and I learnt so much. I learnt about the ways of different people and I...when I am with him...I forget about my problems. I forget Cal and his controlling ways."

Oh no. I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

"You know that Jack is not going to be there all the time?"

"Do you know that Edward is not going to save you?" Rose asked from me.

Her forcefulness took me back for a moment and I wondered if I should tell her what I planned to do. I supposed the less people who knew then the better it would be. It really was not their business what I planned to do. It was my decision and mine alone. I kept silent as Rose shook her head.

"You will like Jack," she said confidently. "He's nothing like the people we sit with in the dining hall."

"I suppose anything is better than them," I declared. "Promise me that you will never do anything so reckless again, Rose."

"I promise," she said.

I believed her. I stared into her eyes and I knew that she was telling the truth to me. She wouldn't lie about that. With a nod of my head, I stood back up and looked for a dress.

"You should go and get ready," I urged her. "Cal will be wondering where you are. Besides, I need an hour to sort out my hair. The wind makes it more uncontrollable than I could ever imagine."

Rose laughed at me for a moment. She moved from the chair and placed her hand on my shoulder in a soothing manner.

"I am sorry," she said to me. "I know it was foolish of me last night...well..."

"Let us try and forget it," I implored her. "We will put it down to a moment of madness and nothing more. Cal will not hear anything from my mouth."

"Thank you," she said. I knew that was the thing which she had been scared of the most. My brother would end up going crazier than normal if he knew what his fiancée had tried to do. No. It was best to keep it between us. Besides, she trusted me. She needed a friend.

...

"You would never believe what I found out today." Cal spoke to me as soon as I entered the lounge. Everyone was dressed and ready to go down to dinner as I closed the door behind me. I pulled my gloves further up my arms, watching with intent as I did so.

Ruth was sat beside Rose, dressed in their intricate black dresses. Lovejoy was stood in the corner, lurking as per usual. I looked up from smoothing out my red dress and into my brother's eyes.

"And what did you find out?" I asked from him simply.

"Your fiancé's parents are on this ship."

I spluttered as I heard him, my head shaking back and forth as I did so. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Cal moved closer to me, his hands on my shoulders as he did so. I said nothing for a moment, words failing me completely as he tucked a strand of hair behind my ears.

"Yes," he said. "Apparently their son sent the news just before they sailed. He's in the communications business. He inherited the company from his father months ago. Charles Marcel is his name."

"How did you not know this?" I snapped at him, my voice tight and full of annoyance. "I thought mother and father were still choosing."

"Perhaps they wanted it to be a surprise when you returned home?" Cal suggested. "Or they did not have time to send the news before we set sail. I do not know. I have seen the letter though. Miss Emily Hockley is to wed Mr Charles Marcel in the fall."

"Congratulations, Miss Hockley." Lovejoy was the one to speak as I felt my eyes turned to glare at him. I knew he was taunting me. He always enjoyed doing just that.

"Wonderful news," Ruth agreed with enthusiasm. "Two weddings when we return to Philadelphia. How wonderful."

"Cal," I protested to my brother once again. An impatient look crossed his face again as he shook his head. I could feel the colour drain from my face once more as he looked around the room and to the people who still sat there.

"I need to speak with Emily," he declared. "I am sure Lovejoy is capable of showing you to dinner. I shall join you shortly."

I watched as they all left and felt myself shake. Why did this matter? I was running away. I was leaving with Edward. A name to an unknown man should not make any difference to me. I would not marry him anyway.

Cal's hand rested on the small of my back as he sat me down on the chaise longue. He sat beside me, leaning forwards and pouring me a brandy.

"I suppose I should not have sprung that news on you like I just did," Cal said to me. I snorted once, nodding in agreement with that analysis. He really shouldn't have. I took a moment to hold the brandy in my hands before downing it.

"I have heard of Charles, Emily," Cal said to me. "He is a few years younger than me. He's a complete gentleman. You have nothing to worry about. He enjoys gambling, but what man doesn't?"

"Cal," I whispered, looking down into my drink again. "I really do not want to do this."

I don't know why I bothered. Why did I even think he would change his mind? Why did I think that I could keep appealing to him? Every time I did, I was quashed back down. He wouldn't listen to me or my worries.

"We have talked about this, Emily," Cal reminded me. "It really is not your decision, my sweet sister."

"It is," I protested to him. I drank the remainder of the alcohol, telling myself that if he would not listen then I would definitely go through with Edward's arrangement. "I do not know him. I do not want to marry someone who I do not know."

"Not this again," Cal complained. "I understand you are nervous. Rose was nervous when she met me. Look at us now."

"What if...Cal...I cannot do it," I complained, slamming my glass down on the coffee table as rage bubbled over in my veins. "You are my brother. You are supposed to care about me. You are supposed to want me to be happy."

Cal stood up then, watching me with resentment for a moment. I allowed my arms to flap by my side as I snapped at him, unable to control my anger at him.

"I do want you to be happy," he assured me. "This marriage will make you happier than you could imagine."

"It makes you happy," I replied. "It makes you and mother and father happy. You can ship me off to someone else to take care of me. I didn't know that supporting me was that much of an issue. It is the thought of me eating away at your inheritance, Cal?" I snapped, unable to stop myself. I knew I had gone too far. I really had pushed it too far.

I just longed for him to listen to me. I longed for him to understand. I wanted that more than anything. I didn't truly want to run away. I loved Cal. Deep down I loved my parents.

But I loved what Edward could offer me.

"Emily," Cal said, his voice low and dangerous. "Do not raise your voice at me. You will come to dinner and meet your future parents in law. You will be charming and graceful. You will be everything mother and father brought you up to be."

"And if I am not?" I asked.

"Then you will suffer," Cal promised me. "Why can you not be more like Rose?"

"Because I am not her," I snapped. "I will not do it, Cal. I refuse to sit by and let this happen. I refuse to marry someone who I do not know."

He chuckled at hearing that, pouring himself a brandy as soon as I had stopped glaring at him.

"You will," he said simply. "What do you intend to do, Emily? Run away?"

"If I must," I said and turned on my heel, ready to run from the room.

I didn't get far as Cal's hand wrapped around my elbow, dragging me back to him as I wormed around in his hold, not found of being held in his strong arms when he was forcing me into something.

"No," Cal demanded me. "You will do this."

"Make me!" I snapped at him.

And then I knew that I had gone too far. I had pushed him over the edge. His hand moved, connecting with my cheek. I felt the sting as my head turned to the side and I realised he had hit me. He had struck me.

His hands instantly left my arms and I moved my hand to my cheek. The stinging continued to throb and I refused to look at him. I couldn't bring myself to look into his eyes. Never before had Cal struck me. Never before had he harmed me in any way possible.

"I did not mean to do that," he said, his voice deep and low. "You pushed me, Emily. Now, go to your room and stay there for the night. I shall say you are ill."

I turned on my heel, almost tripping over my dress as I moved from the room. I slammed the door behind me with force and looked to my door. I rushed inside and leant against the wood. I took a deep breath, thinking about what had just happened before I looked in the mirror.

"Miss."

I looked up as Mary left the en-suite with fresh towels. She dropped them as soon as she looked upon my face and I allowed a choked sob to escape my lips as tears fell down my cheeks. Why was I crying? I hated Cal for what he had done. I hated him for thinking he could control me. I had tried to plead with him.

"Who did this to you?" Mary asked as she stepped forwards. Her arm wrapped around my waist, guiding me to sit on my bed. Her fingers touched my cheek, running over the redness of where Cal had struck me.

"Miss," she urged me softly. "Who did this?"

"Cal," I whispered out.

Mary said nothing, knowing full well that it was not possible for her to complain. She could do nothing against Cal. She had no power against him. She had no chance to reprimand him.

"I shall get you some ice, Miss," she assured me.

"No," I muttered. "I do not need ice. I do not need anything."

"Miss-"

"-I am fine, Mary," I interrupted her with my lie. "I do not need anything. Please...leave it alone..."

I could sense her hesitance but she said nothing. She curtseyed quickly and left me alone in my room to my own silent tears. I said nothing for a few moments, wondering where Cal was. Was he managing to smile and joke? Was he managing to laugh along with everyone else? He certainly seemed to be a skilled liar.

I changed out of my dress and locked my door, refusing to see Cal that night if he came grovelling. Although grovelling really was not his scene. I placed my nightdress on before I finally did hear a knock on the door. I said nothing, refusing to answer before I heard his voice.

"Miss Emily," he called out. "Are you there?"

My brows rose on my forehead and I moved out from my room, walking slowly to the door before unlocking it to reveal Edward stood there. His cheeks were red and his face was full of concern as he forced himself into the room. I instantly moved over my robe, draping it over my shoulders as he watched me for a moment.

"Miss Rose said that you should have been at dinner," he explained to me. "I heard her and Mr Hockley discussing you. He said that there had been an argument...I worried he had found out about what we...you...intend to do."

I watched him for a moment and shook my head. His eyes slowly came to the mark on my cheek and I saw his jaw lock for a moment. He stepped forwards, his hand slowly moving to the red patch as I winced.

"He does not know of that," I promised Edward as he allowed his fingers to dance over the mark. "He said that my future in laws were here. I tried to...I tried to plead with him not to make me marry...Cal did not take well to that..." I whispered in fear.

Edward inhaled sharply.

"He hit you?"

"Yes," I whispered. "He has never done anything like that before. He was-

"-Why are you trying to defend him?" he interrupted me and asked the question. My jaw shut quickly and I shook my head slowly. I didn't know. I really had no idea why I was trying to defend him. Was that what I was doing?

"I'm not," I assured Edward. "I did not mean to."

"Good," he said. "A man should never hit a woman. I've seen enough of those types of scum in my life."

I said nothing as Edward took hold of my hand, the motion soft and tender as he pressed his lips to my knuckles. I watched him with my mouth agape before he lowered my hand.

"He cannot get away with it, Emily," he said to me. "It is not right."

"The world is not right," I implored him. "Honestly, Edward, there is nothing more to it. When we dock then we run."

"We run," he repeated to me.

I nodded, wrapping my arms around his waist before resting my head under his neck. He rested his chin on top of my head, his arms going back around me as I realised how odd this truly was. Yet, it did not feel odd. None of it felt odd. It felt perfectly natural to me.

I pulled back for a moment, wondering what to say to him. I was at a loss for words. I slowly reached up and thought of what I was about to do. Edward didn't seem to complain as his hand moved to the small of my back and pushed me closer against him.

"You really are slow," he taunted me and I chuckled once, hitting him on the arm as he smirked and finally kissed me. I held tightly to him, wondering it would feel as good as the first kiss which we had shared. Apparently it did.

I heard nothing as he continued to kiss me, slowly moving me backwards until my back hit the wall and I felt a slow moan escape my lips. I wondered if the noise had truly come from me as I startled and Edward chuckled, moving his lips from mine and working them down my neck.

"Oh God," I groaned as his hands held my hips, pressing them against the wall and his lips refused to move from my neck. "Edward...we can't...not here..."

"Are you really protesting?" He asked me as his lips rested on the base of my neck. "I don't think you are, Miss."

"I'm Emily," I replied to him as he smirked against my skin and bit down on a sensitive spot. I could barely manage to understand what was happening as his lips moved back up my neck and his forehead finally rested against mine.

"I know," he replied to me. "Emily."

As soon as he had spoken I moved my lips to his once more, kissing him feverishly. I barely noticed the opening of the door as Edward moved against me.

"Emily."

Edward pulled off me instantly, his hands leaving my hips and resting by his sides. I looked across to where my brother stood. His face was one of fury and anger. I choked for a moment as Cal moved into the room, Lovejoy behind him with an amused look on his face.

"What the hell is this?" Cal wondered.

"Nothing," I said back to him. "It is none of your business who I see."

"It is my business when my sister acts like a harlot," Cal spat at me. I winced at the venom in his voice, wondering what more he could say.

"She is not," Edward defended me. "I care for your sister very much."

"And so you forced yourself upon her?"

"That is not how it happened!" I snapped.

Cal turned to look at Lovejoy, a glance of understanding from both of them as Lovejoy nodded.

"It seems that is what happened," he said to Cal. I scoffed as Lovejoy moved further into the room, grabbing Edward by the upper arm.

"What are you doing?" I snapped. "Cal, stop this. He did nothing to me."

"Rape is a crime, boy," Cal warned him. I shook my head, moving after Edward who was still worming around in Lovejoy's hold. I shook my head, anger fuelling my body as Cal wrapped his arm around my waist, refusing to allow me to leave the room.

"He did not rape me!" I snapped at Cal as Edward's yells echoed down the hall. Cal continued to hold me around the waist, slamming the door shut and silencing Edward and his protests.

"You stupid chit," Cal snapped at me as I continued to hit against his chest, my robe loosening around my body as I did so. "Sleeping with another man whilst your fiancé waits for you."

"I was not sleeping with him!" I yelled. "I care for Edward!"

"What?" Cal wondered. "He is a serving boy. He is a stupid boy, hardly a man worthy of you. He's simply someone who has shown you an interest. That does not mean he is worthy of your attentions, Emily. You were stupid enough to think he cared. Why would he? You are simply convenient fun on this ship."

"No," I denied. "He is not like that."

"They are all like that," Cal assured me. "What? Did he promise to take you away from the ship? Did he promise to save you from your marriage? And what do you think he will do when he has had his fill of you?" Cal wondered. "And when you have five spawns running around...no money...do you think he will want you clinging to him then?"

I stopped my fighting against Cal as I took in what he said. He was wrong. Edward wouldn't do that.

"What makes you think he is special?" Cal wondered. "You have known him for a matter of days. He is not someone who you love, Emily. You do not know him. You love the idea of someone loving you. You love the idea of being saved."

"No, I do not," I denied.

"Of course you do," Cal scoffed as I sat down on the bed. "You are a naive girl, Emily. You want someone. You want someone to love you. He is not the answer to your dreams. He will not provide for you when he has had enough of you. You know that."

I said nothing as Cal took a seat beside me, his hand on my back as his other hand rubbed the tears from my eyes.

"I have seen it before," Cal promised me. "Beautiful girls being shown attention by men lower than themselves. They are then cast out and pregnant. The boy promises that he will look after them. She thinks true love will save them. It never does, Emily. He turns to the bottle and she turns to street corners."

I winced at hearing that, my head shaking back and forth as I did so.

"You...you are lying..."

"Ask mother of the Ravenwood's maid," Cal instructed me. "She will tell you the truth. This boy does not love you. He does not care for you. He sees a fancy, sad, posh girl. He offers he a way out via him. Does it sound familiar?"

I said nothing to him, waiting for a moment as Cal ran the back of his hand down my hair.

"You have been a fool, Emily," he told me. "You have been a silly fool. But, you are young. You are young...and I will forgive you..."

I kept quiet as Cal stood up, his hands pushing my hair over my shoulders before he kissed the top of my head.

"Get some sleep, Emily," he urged me. "Think about what I have said."

"What about Edward?" I wondered.

"I shall see to the boy. I will not kill him...but I will find the truth out," Cal promised me. "Who do you believe? Me, your brother, or some serving boy?"

Words failed me once more as Cal turned on his heel and left me alone in the room by myself. I felt another sob choke up inside of me as a headache approached.

What had I done?

...


	7. Chapter 7

I refused to sleep that night. I refused to think of anything but Edward and what had happened to him. He had done nothing wrong. He did not deserve to spend his time on the ship as a criminal. He had done nothing which I had not consented to. I knew that I had told him that we shouldn't. I knew it was improper. But I had never told him to stop in a serious manner.

And then I remembered what Cal had told me. Cal was right. I barely knew Edward. I barely knew him or what he was offering me. What if he did leave me in the future with a brood of children? Would I be stupid enough to let that happen? Was I so naive?

What if Cal spoke sense? He may have changed, but he was my brother. He wanted the best for me. Did he know that Edward would hurt me in the future?

My mind was a constant whirl of activity, preventing me from sleeping. I managed to change into a simple pink dress, pushing it over my body with haste. I left the room as it was, knowing full well that it was late at night. I had to see Cal. He couldn't let Edward be punished for something which he had not done.

"Cal?" I knocked on the door to his suite. There was no answer for a moment.

"Emily," Cal sighed my name. His hair was dishevelled and his bowtie was hung loose around his collar, his jacket open wide. A glass of brandy sat in his hand as he let me into the room. "What are you doing awake?"

"I couldn't sleep," I said to him. "You have to let Edward go, Cal. He did nothing wrong, please, I can't bear sitting there when he has done nothing wrong."

"I have been to see the boy," Cal admitted, downing the brandy. "I saw my doting fiancée on the way there. Apparently she is having a busy night."

I said nothing in response, wondering what he was talking about. He waved a hand and poured himself another glass of alcohol.

"Rose can wait until the morning," Cal said. "You are in a worse situation than she is."

"Cal," I complained to him. "He did nothing that I did not consent to."

"And what would have happened if he continued?" Cal asked. "Would you have been pregnant by the time we managed to get to Philadelphia?"

"No," I promised him. "I am not that stupid."

"Really?" he asked in disbelief, drinking some more of the liquid. "The boy maintains that he did nothing wrong. He says that he cares for you and you care for him. He wants you to run off with him. He accused me of keeping my sister locked away, forcing her to marry someone who she does not love."

I said nothing, knowing full well that Edward's accusations would have earned him a good beating. My little outburst earned me a slap, and I was his sister. God only knew what he had done to the poor boy. I had never thought it possible for my brother to be so vindictive and cruel. It sickened me more than I cared to admit.

"He did nothing wrong."

"Was he speaking sense?" Cal asked me, his eyes glaring into mine.

I avoided his gaze for a moment, my hands running up and down my bare arms as I took a seat on the lounge. I perched on the edge of it, looking down to my lap as Cal continued to stare at me.

"If you have listened to anything that I have ever said," I spoke after a moment, "then you will know that it is true. You will know that I do not want this marriage."

Cal paused for a moment, gathering his thoughts. "And did you plan to run away with the boy? Was he speaking the truth?"

My throat dried up, tears welling in my eyes. I knew there was no chance of that happening now. Cal would have his eye on me for the entire journey home. Lovejoy wouldn't leave me alone. Even Mary could be bought into his service. Cal was in control.

"Yes," I whispered, knowing full well that lying would not get me out of this mess I had found myself in. It would only make Cal angrier. I looked up at him, my vision blurred with wetness from my eyes. "You wouldn't listen to me, Cal. You wouldn't listen to anything that I said...I felt trapped...I felt scared...I still am..."

"And he came along," Cal clarified. "He saw you as a weak girl and offered you a way out."

"And I would have taken it," I promised my brother. "Without a second thought. I do not want to be here, Cal. I want to go home...but not to marry...Edward...he did nothing..."

"He took advantage of you when you were at your weakest," Cal declared, his voice harsh and curt. I felt the pillow next to me sink down as he sat beside me. "Emily, no man should have done that. He has tried to lead you astray. He has willingly tried to ruin you because he saw how vulnerable you were."

"I agreed," I replied, defending Edward. "Cal, I agreed to go with him. I knew what he was doing."

"Did you?" Cal asked. "You cannot go with him, Emily. You are a Hockley and you have a duty."

"Do you listen to anything I say?" I snapped at him, turning my gaze to him. "Are you permanently deaf?"

"Emily," he warned me, his voice low and dangerous. "Do not test me. You should be thanking me that I stopped that boy before he did truly dishonour you."

"Edward is a good man," I said. "I would rather marry him than go back to Philadelphia to marry some stuck up transport tycoon."

"You hardly know him," Cal snapped in disbelief. "You do not know who he is. Mark my words, Emily. He will run as soon as he has had what he wants from you."

"How do you know that?" Emily asked. "You do not know him. I do...he...you need to release him, Cal."

"No," he refused quickly. "I shall do no such thing. That boy is a liability to himself, and to you."

"I can go and tell the truth," I assured my brother. "I can tell them that what you said is lies."

"You shall do no such thing," Cal said. "I shall see to that. You will not be seeing that boy for the remainder of the journey. I can promise you that."

I stood up and began to pace, the cold air of the night affecting me more than I had thought it would.

"Cal, you are lying," I said to my brother. "You cannot keep me hidden away forever. The truth will come out."

"Are you forgetting who I am, Emily?" Cal asked from me, lounging back on the seat, his arm moving across the back of it. A lazy smirk entertained his face. "I am a Hockley. I am the one who is in charge. If the boy is guilty then I say he is guilty."

"No!" I snapped at Cal. "That is not fair! You know rape is a crime! He will go to jail as soon as we reach the States!"

"I assume so," Cal said in a drawl. "Although that is none of my concern."

"Please," I replied, my conscience unable to bear the thought of Edward locked away from a crime which he did not commit. A crime which he had never committed before. "I will do anything, Cal. Don't do this to him."

Cal regarded me for a moment, swirling the liquid in his glass around as he did so. He looked to the bottom of the glass before he drained the brandy.

"The boy will stay away from you," Cal said. "You will stay away from him. You will come back to Philadelphia and be the dutiful daughter you were raised to be. That is the condition, Emily. If I am to see you with him again, I shall make sure he suffers more than he has done."

"What have you done to him?" I asked him, shock coming over my features. Who was this man sat in front of me? He was not the brother who I knew.

"You should ask Lovejoy," Cal replied, standing up. He stood opposite me, watching me with intent as he spoke again; "Do we have a deal, Emily? I assume you understand that I shall be keeping you close from now on."

Shaking my head back and forth, my hands balled into fists by my side. I found myself unable to comprehend why he would do this. What had he become? I detested him. At that moment in time, I found myself unable to look at him with the love which I had held for him once before.

"You've changed, Cal." I said to him.

"I've grown up," he replied. "You should do the same. Now, answer the question. Do you agree to my terms?"

"I hardly have a choice," I replied.

"I'm glad you see it that way," Cal nodded bluntly. "Now, come along. I shall escort you back to your room and collect you for breakfast. You are not to go anywhere without me or Lovejoy. Do you understand me?"

"You'll make sure I understand, no doubt," I snarled at him, my anger apparent as my cheeks warmed. Cal took hold of my elbow, steering me out of the door and back down the corridor.

Lovejoy appeared as I neared my door and I noted him holding a handkerchief which was covered with a stain of blood. He followed my gaze as I became horrified at the sight of it.

"Not my blood, Miss Hockley," he assured me. "No need to concern yourself over my safety."

"I really wasn't," I snapped back at him, unable to comprehend what he had done. Why had he done it? How badly beaten was Edward? "How...Edward..."

"He's breathing," Cal said, opening the door to my room, his gaze fixed on Lovejoy.

"Just," Lovejoy confirmed to me. I strained in Cal's hold, trying to force myself from his grasp. He turned me around to face him, pushing me back into the room. I continued to squirm against him as both his hands wrapped around my upper arms until he pushed me against the wall.

"Why?" I snapped at him. "Why did you hurt him? He is innocent!"

"He had his paws all over my sister," Cal replied, his hair falling in his face as he shook his head back and forth. Lovejoy lurked by the closed door, watching with intrigue as Cal and I refused to stop arguing.

"With your sister's consent," I replied. "You're a monster, Cal. You're an absolute bastard!"

His pulse must have quickened for I felt my cheek redden for another time that night. His hand made contact with my skin quickly before his fingers left my arms as I held onto the stinging pain.

"Does that make you feel better?" I snapped, tears rolling down my cheeks. "Hitting me...does it help?"

"No," Cal admitted. "But you bring it upon yourself, Emily. All I have wanted to do is help you. All I want for you is to be happy. I am your brother!" he yelled at me. "I am your brother and I provide you with all of this finery!"

I remained stood where I was as Cal moved through the room. He looked to my dresser, his hand sliding across it with one strike, throwing all my possession to the floor.

"The Hockley name keeps you in luxury!" he continued to yell as I quivered where I was. He moved to my wardrobe, dragging out all of my dresses and throwing them to floor. "And how would you repay us? Repay me? You would go around and sleep with a serving boy! You would run away from us! From the people who care for you!"

"And you care for me that much?" I wondered from him. "You care for me so much that you strike me? You make me marry someone I do not know? Yes, Cal," my tone turned sarcastic. "I can simply just feel the love."

"You insolent bitch," Cal hissed. He remained stood where he was, refusing to move any closer to me. At least he couldn't slap me again. "You think you are so clever, don't you, Emily? You managed to gain an education. Who was that courtesy of? The Hockley name! You would be nothing without it!"

"I would be happier," I replied quickly. "I would prefer to be without it!"

Cal shook his head, his hands dropping to his hips as he looked to the ground.

"You will go to sleep," Cal informed me. "And I shall see you tomorrow. I cannot stand the sight of you at this moment in time."

"Likewise," I assured him, my arms folding over my chest. With one final glare, he turned on his heel and left me alone in my room as Lovejoy followed him like the dutiful servant he was.

My knees finally gave out on me and I sank to the ground. Sobs freely escaped my lips and I found myself unable to stop crying for the remainder of the night.

...

I must have managed to get to bed for I woke up with my head on a pillow. My head pounded and my cheek stung. I looked across the room as I sat up, my vision still blurred as I saw Mary stood at the end of the bed. A handful of gowns were in her hands and I remembered everything that had happened.

"Mary," I croaked and she looked at me. She moved over to the bed, boldly sitting on the edge of it before wrapping her arms around me, holding me tightly to her.

"Miss Emily," she sighed softly. "I heard what happened...your brother...the waiting boy...everything..."

"I've been a stupid girl, Mary," I sobbed on her shoulder, my own arms wrapping around her waist. "Cal hates me...Edward is hurt..."

"You have been a girl looking for a way out," Mary promised me. "You have done nothing wrong, Miss Emily. And if I could help you, then I would. Without a second of hesitance. But...your brother...he has that bodyguard of his watching your every movement."

"No, you can't help," I promised her. "I don't want you to get into trouble. This is my mess...Edward...he comes first...he needs to be safe and away from Cal."

"The boy is free and working in third class," Mary spoke. "I made sure this morning, Miss. I knew you would want to know."

"Mary," I spoke quickly. "Can you send a note to him? I need him to know that I am sorry...so sorry for everything."

"I can try, Miss," she promised me. I smiled once at her as I moved from the bed. "Your brother wants you to be ready by half past eight to dine with him. Him and his fiancée have just had a falling out."

"What about?" I asked as Mary unlaced my dress.

"She spent her night dancing with that boy who saved her life," Mary said. I gasped once at the thought. "Your brother is not happy."

"When is he ever happy?" I asked rhetorically, knowing full well that Mary would never respond to that question. She would deem it rude to.

She finished readying me and I told her that I would write a note when I had time to think straight. Little did I know that I wouldn't have time to think straight. For that was the night when the unsinkable ship hit an iceberg.

...

A/N: Thank you to Lady Fides and et-spiritus-sancti, SARAHBABE215 and cgluv for reviewing. Do let me know what you think!


	8. Chapter 8

"He hit you."

I remained silent before turning to look at Rose. She was sat next door to me at afternoon tea. Her mother and three other women took to a table alone. I said nothing, my eyes lowered down on the table cloth as I reached for my cup of tea. Rose's stare was persistent as I moved my free hand to my cheek, self consciously running my fingers down it.

"Twice in the past night," I agreed with her.

Rose gasped at hearing that. Apparently she couldn't believe what he had done. She wasn't the only one. It still sickened me to think of how easily he could strike me. I shouldn't be surprised though. We had spent the morning wandering around the deck of the ship. My arm had stayed inside of Cal's as he refused to let me go to anyone else. He was reluctant to let me dine with Rose. Lovejoy stood in the corner of the room, speaking with a waiter as I sipped my tea.

"What happened?" Rose wondered. "He refused to tell me anything. He was so angry this morning...not only with me...but with you, or so it would seem."

"What did you do?" I asked her, trying to change the topic.

"I spent the night dancing with Jack," she admitted. "In steerage. Cal was less than impressed. He yelled at me...mother told me not to see him again...and I listened to her. I didn't want to. But...I am engaged."

I said nothing as I heard her story, waiting for her to continue with her line of questioning. I knew she would soon enough.

"What did you do?" Rose finally asked.

I groaned, setting down my teacup before I looked her in the eye.

"Cal walked in on Edward and me," I said. "It was a rather compromising position. I had already pleaded with him earlier not to make me marry before you left for dinner. I begged him and lost my temper. He struck me. And then he found Edward...he demanded him to be taken away for...well..." my words stopped flowing as my mouth dried up. "Rape."

"No," Rose shook her head, disbelief evident in her voice. "But...he didn't, did he? Edward wouldn't..."

"He didn't," I promised her. "Cal didn't see it that way. He needs to protect my honour. Being engaged and acting like a whore will not do me any good, will it?"

"I suppose not," Rose limply agreed with me.

"Anyway, Edward has been released. He is working in third class. It will remain that way so long as I go back to Philadelphia and marry who I am supposed to," I spoke, my voice holding no tone of emotion. I felt nothing. No emotions came to me. There was nothing but numbness. There was nothing left for me to do.

"He blackmailed you?" Rose checked with me.

I snorted.

"This is Cal we are speaking of," I reminded her. "He can do what he likes. He has the power to get anyone to do his bidding...even his own sister..."

"Emily," Rose sighed my name. I shrugged nonchalantly.

"There is nothing more, Rose," I replied. "I suppose once I am married then I will be out from Cal's clutches. That is what I want the most. He's a monster. He's not the brother who I once knew."

I looked at her then, realising that I should have held my tongue. She had to marry this monster. But she looked at me as if there was something more. She looked at me as if she had some other plan up her sleeve. I couldn't explain it at that moment in time. She said nothing for a moment, delicately sipping on her tea as she regarded me with hesitance.

"Jack has offered me a chance to leave with him once the ship docks," Rose admitted.

I couldn't help the scoff which escaped me. I leaned in closer to her, my eyes wide as I did so.

"Edward offered me the same thing, Rose. Look at what happened to us." I warned her. "Are you seriously considering this?"

"Yes," she said without a moment of hesitance. "Marrying Cal...you know as well as I what he is like. You know who he is, Emily."

"I know," I agreed weakly. "You...you should do it."

"And what about you?" Rose asked from me. "He has struck you."

"And he has done a lot worse to Edward," I spoke. "He has had him beat. I need to do as I am told for Edward's sake. What if he was to be harmed again because of me? Cal is relentless, Rose. Please...just don't get hurt."

"I will try not to," Rose said to me. "You should go and rest, Emily. You look tired and ill."

"I feel ill," I assured her. "Where are you going to go?"

"To Jack," she said simply, pushing her chair back and standing up. I said nothing for a moment, watching her with intrigue as she smiled down at me. "You need to get away from Cal."

"I intend to," I promised her simply. "You do not need to worry about that."

"But not into a loveless marriage," Rose said to me. "Come with me and Jack."

I shook my head, standing too as I walked to her side of the table. I linked her arm with mine as we left the dining hall. Lovejoy noticed us and I knew he would be following in a moment.

"It is not worth the risk," I informed her. "Go to Jack, Rose. Do what I couldn't. Get away from here."

I kissed her on the cheek as I let go of her arm. She looked shocked as I pulled back from her. Even I was slightly shocked at my own action. I wasn't the type to show affection easily.

"And where are you going, Miss DeWitt Bukater?" Lovejoy asked from Rose as she let go of me and we made to part in different directions. Rose stumbled for a moment as I looked at Lovejoy fiercely, tired of having him follow my every movement.

"She is going for a walk. I am going to lay down." I informed him. "Which one do you follow, Lovejoy? I am sure Cal wants both of us to be watched like a hawk."

Lovejoy regarded me with disregard. I rolled my eyes, tiring of having him look at me with such distaste. I finally began to walk down the corridor, wondering if I had managed to rid myself of him. Apparently it was not meant to be.

"You're becoming quite the little madam," Lovejoy suddenly said, his hand wrapping around my elbow. I fought him off, refusing to allow him to touch me in any way.

"And you have become quite the little liar," I said, reminding him of last night. "How much of a raise did Cal offer you to beat Edward? I imagine it would have to be a nice amount."

"Rather a nice amount, thank you very much," Lovejoy smirked. I felt myself sicken as I heard him speak. "Mr Hockley does not appreciate his sister whoring herself out to men."

"How dare you!" I snapped at him, turning to face him as we stood in the middle of the corridor, both of us glaring at each other. People stopped to watch the show. "You have no right to speak to me like that!"

"I have every right," Lovejoy promised me. "Mr Hockley wouldn't mind, I assure you. He can barely stand to look at you."

"I can find my own way back," I snapped at him, rushing down the corridor as people continued to watch me with entertainment. I said nothing, knowing full well that Lovejoy was following me. I finally reached my room, slamming the door shut with as much force as I could muster. I hated him. I hated Cal.

"What was that?"

I could hear Cal's question from the other side of the wood as I leant against the door, my ear pressed to the wooden plank as I waited for them to continue their conversation.

"Your sister, Mr Hockley," Lovejoy responded. "She doesn't seem to enjoy my company."

"She doesn't enjoy anyone's company," Cal complained. "Let her stew over her beloved serving boy. She'll forget about him soon enough."

"You still want him to stay where he is?" Lovejoy checked.

"As long as Emily doesn't know he is locked away then I fail to see the issue. No one should be able to mess with a Hockley. Let Emily believe he is working in third class. Her maid certainly has the lie down to a tee."

"As you wish, Mr Hockley."

"You should go and find Rose. It is her who I fail to trust nowadays. It seems both the women in my life are intent on driving me to an early grave."

"As you wish, Mr Hockley."

I could scarcely believe what I had heard. He had lied to me. Cal had blatantly lied. And Mary had done it too. She had lied to my face without a moment of hesitation. But I did not blame her fully. I knew how Cal worked. He would have manipulated her. No doubt he would have scared her into an early grave.

I shook my head, knowing that I had to do something about this. Clearly Cal couldn't be trusted.

I moved from my room again, keeping quiet this time as I wandered down corridors, my head bowed to hide my face. I made my way to the elevator.

"I need you to show me where the master at arms would hold a prisoner," I demanded from the man operating the lift.

"Miss, you do not want to be going down there. It really is not your place," he informed me, shaking his head.

I could hear whispers from behind me as I sighed. I rolled my eyes and stepped into the elevator.

"Take me down," I demanded. "You do work here, do you not? You do as _I _command."

I knew I sounded horrible. I sounded like someone who I hated. But I was tired.

He looked at me wearily and stepped into the elevator. I nodded in content as he lowered it and I followed him through the maze of corridors, simply content that he was showing me the way for I knew I would get lost on my own. He held the doors open and regarded me with weariness until we finally came to meet the master at arms.

"Sir," he spoke as he knocked and opened the door to a small office. "This young lady would like a word with you."

The man stood up as I entered the room, offering my hand to him.

"Ah," he spoke, sensing that he already knew who I was. "I assume you are Miss Hockley."

"I am," I declared.

"I thought so," he replied. "You look a lot like your brother. He also told me that if you should make it down here then I am to send for him straight away."

"I have done no harm," I replied simply. "I am here to tell you to let a free man go."

"He said you felt compelled to stick up for young Mr Edward," he said and I felt a groan escape my lips. "I'm afraid it is his word against yours, Miss Hockley. The boy is adamant that he had no part in his offence."

"He is telling the truth," I promised him. "My brother does not know what happened. Edward did nothing wrong. Is it your job to hold innocent people to account?"

He regarded me with caution then as I arched a brow in his direction. I refused to give up on this vendetta. Edward had done nothing wrong and so should not be punished. He should be let go and free.

"If I let the boy go then Mr Hockley will go to a higher authority, Miss," he said to me. "Besides, like I said, Mr Hockley gave a detailed account of what happened."

"He lied!" I snapped. "Edward did nothing wrong. Dear God, why can you not see that? If he is supposed to have committed a crime then it is against me! No crime was committed! I say so."

"I shall speak to Mr Hockley again, Miss," he said. He didn't believe me. Cal had managed to lie to him easily. His look of disregard showed me as much. "I will try and get this mess sorted out...but...it is Mr Hockley who makes the decisions at the end of the day. It is his word against yours."

"You mean he is believed because he is a man?" I checked with him and he said nothing. I sighed. "Can I at least see Edward?"

"Miss, I am not sure if that is a good idea."

"Please," I pleaded with him. "I need to make sure he is safe...just this one thing..."

He sighed, but nodded.

"Of course," he said. "Follow me."

I did as I was told, walking down a corridor from his office until we came to another large room which held four white cells. Only one was occupied.

"Edward," I sighed as soon as I saw him.

He looked up, standing on his feet as he scrambled to the bars of the cell. He wrapped his fingers around the metal and I stood opposite him. I moved my hand through the bars, stroking my fingers down his cheek as he smiled at me, his own hand moving to grab my free one.

"What are you doing here?"

"Cal said that you were working in third class. He told me that nothing would happen to you so long as I remained dutiful to him...but...he lied...it is all he does...Edward...how badly did he hurt you?"

"One swift punch," he said to me with a nonchalant shrug. Clearly it didn't bother him. "It was his bodyguard who delivered the rest."

I looked over his face, taking in the cuts and the black eye. How could he be harmed this badly? Why did the master at arms let this happen? This was not right. Edward had done nothing wrong.

"I told them it was a lie," I promised him. "I told Cal that I was...we..."

"Sh," he urged me, his hand moving under my chin as he forced himself to smile. "This is not your fault. It is your brother who did this to us."

"I will get you out of here," I assured him. "I will go to Cal...I will make sure..."

"Don't worry about me," he said; his voice full of false confidence. "Look after yourself."

I nodded sternly, knowing that I had to act sooner rather than later. I managed to peck him on the cheek before being told my time to see him was up. I left him in the cell, my heart heavy with every step I took away from him. I left the master at arms, choosing to make my way back to Cal's cabin.

I walked with firm steps, refusing to forget the anger which raged inside of me. I didn't even bother to knock as I entered the suite. Cal and Lovejoy were stood there, a piece of paper in Cal's hand as I glared at him.

"Emily," Cal spoke. "How nice of you to join us-"

I cut him off from his sentence. My hand had balled into a fist on its own accord before making contact with his jaw. I was the one to yell in pain as I grabbed onto my fist, knowing full well that it would bruise.

"Jesus Christ," I snapped as Cal grunted.

His hand was on his cheek as Lovejoy watched with intrigue. I waited for his gaze to rise again to look back into mine.

"You lying bastard," I snarled at him. "You lied to me! You did nothing!"

Cal's hand was still resting on his cheek as Lovejoy coughed awkwardly.

"Go and find Rose," Cal demanded from him. The bodyguard did not need to be told twice.

"I agreed to come with you," I snapped at Cal, hot tears forming down my cheeks. "I agreed to marry so long as you set Edward free. You couldn't do that, could you? And then you lied to my face."

Cal scrunched up the letter he had been holding before he moved closer to me. I did my best not to cower away from him, refusing to give him the satisfaction of seeing me scared. He didn't deserve to feel so powerful.

"I don't know what I am going to do with you, Emily," he finally spoke. "You do not come in here and punch me."

"You deserved it," I replied. "I hate you, Cal. I hate everything you have become. I want you to come with me and release Edward. Or, in the name of God, I am going to go down there and demand for it to happen."

"No," Cal snarled as I moved to the door. His hands grabbed my elbow and he turned to face me. I shook my head, snatching my arm from his hold. "You will do no such thing!"

"Try and stop me," I spoke. I moved around him as he grabbed my arm one more time. But it was not Cal who threw me off balance. A sudden shake vibrated around us as we managed to stay upright. We both looked to the ground as the vibrating continued for a few moments. I looked back into Cal's eyes as he said nothing.

"Stay here," Cal spoke, pushing me from him. "I will see what happened."

He moved quickly, locking the door to the suite as I groaned. I moved onto the balcony and peered out the window, an iceberg the only sight which we had passed.


	9. Chapter 9

I stayed in the room, wondering what the hell had happened. I had moved through the entire suite to the other door at the other end, but it was locked too. It seemed that Cal was nothing but thorough. I sighed loudly before sitting down on the armchair in the corner. I reached for a clean glass and drained the brandy. The taste wasn't particularly pleasant, but I ignored it.

A few moments later the door unlocked again. I stood hastily, the glass falling from my hands and hitting the floor. I looked around as Rose's maid stepped into the room.

"Oh, Miss Hockley," she spoke softly.

I smiled once at her, rushing to the door and looking up and down the corridor. There was no sign of Cal.

"Trudy...can you do me a favour? Just...well...don't tell Cal that I left. If he asks and gets angry tell him that I have gone to find Rose." I tried to think up a lie.

The maid remained confused at my behaviour as I backed out the room, forcing myself to smile at her to put her at ease. I didn't want her thinking that my behaviour was erratic.

"Is everything fine, Miss Hockley?"

"Peachy," I promised her, turning on my heel and rushing down the corridors. I had no idea what the vibrating noise had been. No one seemed to worry for they went about their everyday business. I took to the stairs and rushed down them. My intention was the same as before. I would let Edward go. I didn't intend to let him suffer in a cell.

"Miss."

An arm caught me around the waist as I continued my running down the stairs, trying not to trip on my skirts as I went. It seemed impossible though. I groaned as the pink material continued to become trapped in my shoes.

"What?" I snapped at him, completely forgetting my manners. The occasion really didn't call for them to be used.

"If you could go back up to first class," he spoke to me, "then all will be explained to you about what has happened. It is not safe for you down here."

"What are you talking about?" I wondered, my brows furrowed together. "And who says that I belong in first class?"

"Miss Hockley," he spoke simply and I frowned. I supposed that explained enough. I kept my mouth shut as he regarded me with caution. He took hold of my elbow in his hand. "The ship hit an iceberg. There truly is nothing to worry about. It is simply precaution to evacuate the ship."

My blood ran cold as I heard that. Evacuate the ship. He wanted us to evacuate the ship. That didn't happen unless there was something deadly serious. Evacuation would mean that the ship was sinking. I looked at him for a moment, my head shaking back and forth as I snatched my elbow from his hand.

"Don't lie," I snapped at him. "Go and see to some other people. I need to go-"

"-Miss," he interrupted me. I shook my head, pushing past him and running down the stairs. I tried to remember the way to the master at arms office, my mind a constant whirl of activity as I took a left turn and then a right turn until I came to a recognisable corridor.

I followed the signs above the door as people pushed past me, still confused with what was happening to them as they walked slowly, speaking amongst themselves. Obviously no one bothered to tell those in third class what was happening.

I arrived at the office again, glancing around to find it completely empty with no one in sight. I moved down the corridor and saw Edward in his cell, sat on the floor with one knee bent. His arm hung over it as he titled his head back. My steps clicked on the floor as he opened his eyes.

"Emily," he spoke softly. "What're you doing here? The master said there'd been a crash."

"There has," I confirmed. "I think the ship hit an iceberg. I need to get you out of here."

"The keys are in his office," Edward told me, scrambling to his feet and I nodded. I bent down and checked the lock which was on the cell, noting that a brass key would be needed. "Emily...your brother...what he told you..."

"What?" I wondered as he trailed off, clearly not intent on saying anything further.

"He was wrong," Edward said. "I have no intent of dishonouring you."

I smiled at hearing that, tucking my hair behind my ears before rushing back down the corridor.

"Let's worry about my honour another time," I called back to him.

I saw a cabinet which contained all the keys and I felt a groan rise up in my. I had no idea which key it was. No idea whatsoever. Sickness filled my stomach as I hastily looked, wondering which one I should pick. The lock was fairly large which indicated that a large key would be needed to unlock the door. Finally, I came to a shortlist of three, knowing that time was not on my side.

The master at arms would be back any time in the near future and I would be locked up with Edward if he saw me trying to free him.

"I have three keys," I said, holding them in my shaking hands as Edward looked at them. He shook his head.

"There is a bigger one than those."

"These are the biggest," I complained back to him. "They're the only ones in the cabinet."

"He wouldn't leave them in a cabinet. He would hide the key, wouldn't he? I doubt he would even leave it behind...but there would have to be a spare key..." Edward contemplated.

I nodded once, rushing back down the small corridor before looking around the room. I set about turning over pieces of paper as I searched drawers for the sign of a spare key. It needed to be a big key. That is what he had said to me.

I continued my search, looking anywhere that could hide such an object. A false bottom was in one of the drawers and I felt my heart rate fluctuate as I lifted the bottom up. A sense of joy overcame me as I saw a brass key. I picked it up and ran back down the corridor.

"That's it!" Edward called out, his hands wrapping around the bars as I fitted the key into the lock. Never before had I felt so lucky. The door slid open as he pushed it to the side and rushed out of the small cell. He beamed at me, his arms wrapping around my waist as he picked me up and held me tight to him.

"I'm so sorry," I suddenly blurted out. "You should never have-"

"-How many times do I have to tell you that this is not your fault?" he asked from me, his voice full of ease as he did so. He put me down, his hands on my cheeks as he forced me to look at him. I did so after a moment, my gaze nervous as his was confident.

"If this ship is sinking then we need to get you to a lifeboat," Edward informed me, his hand wrapping into mine.

"What about you?" I wondered.

"I wear the uniform," he informed me, looking down at his white attire which he still wore. "I need to show people the way off the ship. It is my job. No one will care about where I have been. I doubt anyone really knows."

"You want me to leave you be?" I wondered as we moved down the corridors.

Panic seemed to be spreading amongst people as Edward pressed his free hand on the small of my back. He pushed me forwards, his other hand holding mine in the air as we avoided people in the narrow space.

"You have to," he said without a moment of hesitance. "I have a job to do if this ship is being evacuated."

I said nothing more as we rushed down the corridors towards the stairs. We moved up then quickly, walking with haste as we did so. I said nothing as we finally came onto deck. I looked around where people stood as Edward removed his hand from mine and took to wrapping an arm around my waist. I was shocked by the bold movement as I turned to look up at him. I ran my hands along his broad shoulders as he continued to smile down at me.

"You should go and wait for a boat," he said, briefly glancing over my shoulder to see how the boats were beginning to line up. "You need to get off this ship as soon as possible."

"Emily!"

I groaned as I heard the sudden call of my name in a familiar tone. I looked over to where Cal was walking, Rose held in his grip as he went. His face was one of thunder as Edward tenderly wrapped his fingers around my hip and held me tight to his side.

"What the hell are you doing out here? And with him?" Cal's voice boomed.

I shook my head back and forth at my brother, glaring at him as I did so.

"You know as well as I that he did nothing wrong," I replied. "Drop it now, Cal. You're becoming tiresome."

I saw Rose and her mother lurking behind my brother. Ruth's mouth was wide open as she regarded me with obvious distaste. Rose said nothing, choosing to keep quiet as she intently watched what was happening.

"Miss Hockley was kind enough to tell the truth," Edward declared, removing his arm from around me. I looked at him as I lost the warmth which had been by my side and mumbled a small groan as Cal regarded him with distaste. "She set me free. But, she needs to make it onto a boat."

"Do not tell me what she needs," Cal snarled, grabbing my wrist in his fingers. He dragged me to stand beside him, his fingers refusing to leave my wrist. "I shall see to it that you are locked away again."

"He did nothing wrong!" I snapped at my brother.

"That shan't be necessary," Edward promised him. "I intend to go about my duty on this ship. Your sister needs to find a boat to take her to safety."

I looked back at Edward as a lane smile came over his face. Cal coughed awkwardly, clearly not too bothered about what happened to the boy.

"Very well," Cal declared. "You should go about your business then, shouldn't you?"

Clearly Cal had won.

I looked on as Edward bowed at the waist, offering me a small smile before he disappeared into the crowd. He submerged into the rows of people as I strained my neck to watch him go. I tried to pull free of Cal's grip, wanting to do nothing more than go after him. How could he have left so easily?

"We will not be seeing him again," Cal suddenly declared. "If this boat is going down then I assume he is going down with it."

"No," I groaned against Cal's hold, trying to go after him. "Let go of me."

"You are coming with me, Emily," Cal snapped. "You'll be getting on a boat with Rose and her mother. You shall do it. Do you understand me?"

"I don't listen to you," I assured Cal. "After everything you have done, I refuse to listen to you."

Cal's eyes burned down into mine as he said nothing, clearly trying to keep his composure in front of everyone who was watching.

"Well," Ruth spoke up with a clap of her hands. "We should go inside. It will be warmer."

She moved first, walking through the doorway with her head held high.

"Go in, Rose," Cal demanded his fiancée. "I need to speak with my dear sister."

Rose looked at me uncomfortably for a moment. I nodded at her, knowing that there was nothing she could do for me now. She walked inside and I wondered where Jack was in all of this mess. Cal pulled me over to a quiet spot on the deck in the shadows by the edge of the ship.

He let go of me and his hands dropped to his hips. He looked at me for a moment, his gaze narrow as I ran my hands down my arms.

"You went against me," Cal declared.

"And you betrayed me." I concluded. "What more is there, Cal? I don't want to see you again. I want nothing to do with you. Nothing whatsoever."

"Emily-"

"-No," I cut him off, tiring of whimpering to his every word. "You lied to me and hurt Edward. He did nothing to deserve that, did he? He did nothing to deserve your wrath."

Cal continued to stare at me for a few moments and I wondered why he wasn't yelling at me. I wondered why he wasn't informing me how much of a fool I was. Apparently he had tired of doing that. Although I couldn't complain.

"I just discovered my fiancée was willing to run off with some boy," Cal informed me. "I stopped her. I also discovered my sister intended to run away. I stopped you, Emily. I stopped you to protect you. I did it for you. Everything that I do for you is to keep you safe, Emily."

"That's not what you do," I replied. "You control me, Cal."

"Perhaps I go about it the wrong way," Cal said. "You will get off this ship, Emily. You will get off this ship and go home. You will be safe."

"And what about you?"

"I will wait my turn," Cal promised me. "And then we will go home. Do you understand me?"

I looked at him for a moment. For once his gaze was not one of anger. He looked as though he was being sincere. But I didn't care for his sincerity. It would mean nothing to me. I knew what I wanted and he had run off to help others. He was the one who I cared for the most. I needed to make sure he was safe instead of saving my own skin.

"No," I shook my head, slowly backing away from him. "I don't understand, Cal. I don't want what you want."

I turned on my heel and began to run. I could hear Cal behind me, yelling at me to come back. But I paid him no attention. I kept on running as fast as I could, refusing to slow my pace as I rushed over to the other side of the deck in the direction Edward had left.

And I kept on running. I would find him again. I had to.


	10. Chapter 10

I had no idea where I was running to. My determination to find Edward was the only thing which compelled me to keep going. Cal had called after me, urging for me to come back to him. I knew that I couldn't escape him forever. He would find me, he always did, but I had to try and get away from him.

A moment of coherence came over me. How foolish was I being? How silly was I? I had known Edward but a week. I had no idea who he was, yet I was willing to leave my brother behind for him. I was willing to throw everything away for him. I did not love him. I could not love him.

The thought made me laugh as I pushed past people who continued to stare at me, wondering what I could find so entertaining in this time of madness. Keeping my mouth shut was difficult as I jumped up some steps to get a better view. There were multiple men in white suits who were directing first class passengers to life boats.

I saw some blonde hair in the distance as he helped an elderly woman on a boat. I pushed past the people, assuring them that I was not waiting for a boat. I was not leaving without him. I knew that much. The thought did make me feel sick for a moment. Rose had told me that there were not enough boats for all the people on the ship. Some would die if no one found us in the middle of the ocean.

I knew how protocol went. Women and children went first. Men went second. Staff were last.

I pushed the though aside as I came face to face with Edward. He looked startled for a moment as my hands wrapped around his upper arms. He looked down to me as the other workers helped to load the boats. His eyes widened as he took hold of my hand and pulled me to one side in the darkness.

"What are you doing here?" he wondered, pulling the white jacket he wore from his arms. He pushed it around my shoulders, his large hands running up and down my arms in a feeble attempt to warm me up. "You should be queuing for a boat. You should be with your brother."

"I want nothing to do with Cal," I shook my head back and forth, assuring Edward that Cal was not important to me at that moment in time. "He lied to me. I came to find you. I am not leaving this ship without you, Edward. We'll go away and find a way to survive together."

"Emily," he whispered, moving his hand out to cup my cheek. I felt his hand curve around my waist as he brought me closer to him and rested his chin on top of my head. My own arms snaked around his midriff as I buried my face into his chest.

"I'm serious, Edward," I promised him. "I cannot do this without you. I cannot leave you on this ship...going back with Cal is not an option."

"You don't need to go back with him," he assured me. "But you need to get off this ship. It is sinking, Emily. You get off this ship and you make something of yourself. You're an intelligent girl. You do not need a man to support you."

"I know," I said to him, pulling back slightly and looking up to his eyes. "But I do need to make sure that you get out of this alive."

"You owe me nothing," he assured me. "You gave me a better chance at living by saving me from the cell which I was in. Now I will help you. Wait for the next boat and get on it."

"No," I shook my head. "How can you ask me to do that?"

"Easily," Edward promised me. "Do it, Emily."

"Ah, Miss Hockley."

I winced as I heard Lovejoy speak. I cursed him in my head, wondering how he had managed to find me so quickly. I had hoped that I had managed to keep myself hidden from him.

"Your brother is quite worried. It would be really good of you to return to him."

"I'm not going back to Cal," I shook my head, my adamant attitude remaining intact. "I want nothing to do with Cal. Go back and tell him like the good delivery dog you are."

A flicker of anger etched its way across Lovejoy's face. I said nothing as Lovejoy grabbed my wrist and began to drag me from Edward. He acted quickly, taking hold of my other wrist and drawing me back to him. I winced at the sudden tug of war which was happening.

"Don't touch her," Edward growled lowly to Lovejoy. "No one is to touch her and hurt her. Do you understand me?"

"Who the hell do you think you are?" Lovejoy wondered from him. "You're a waiter and nothing more. Mr Hockley already knows how you intend to take his sister from him. He has seen it happen before. Unfortunately for you, Miss Hockley will be going nowhere with you."

"I know that," Edward hissed. "She is to get off this boat as soon as possible, but not with you dragging her away."

"You really are naive," Lovejoy said. "Now come along, Miss Hockley. Miss DeWitt Bukater and her mother are waiting for a boat on the deck below."

"I will wait here," I said, knowing that I was doing all that I could to get away from him.

"I think not," he replied, his head shaking back and forth. "If you are so for your serving boy coming with us, then allow him. He shall not be getting on a boat."

"Fine," Edward agreed to that command.

Lovejoy began to move off with Edward forcing me to move. His arm was wrapped around my waist as he dragged me through the crowds. I looked up at him as he made sure people didn't bump into us.

"I'm not going," I challenged him.

"Yes, you are," he replied. "You will not die on this ship. You will not die in the cold here. Go with Rose and her mother."

"No...what about you?" I whispered. "How can I live with myself? Knowing that I got off and hundreds of others...they will perish...how can I live with myself knowing that?"

"You have to," Edward whispered back. "You have no other choice, Emily. This is not where you are going to die. I am sure of it."

"Oh God," I whispered as we walked down the steps to the next deck. Lovejoy parted the crowds, allowing us to follow suit as we moved nearer to Cal. I saw him turn around as a look of anger took hold of his face. I looked around as he pushed forwards towards me. Surely I had not created this much anger within him.

"What is it?" I asked him as Edward kept his tight grip on me.

"My fiancée," Cal spat. "She ran away. She ran off to go and be his whore! Jack Dawson! A man who cannot give her what she needs! She left without another word."

"Where?" Lovejoy wondered.

"I'm assuming down the ship. Go and find her."

"It is sinking," Lovejoy complained. "It is too dangerous to go decks below."

"Well...do something!" Cal snapped, his arms flapping by his side in frustration. He rested a hand over his temple before looking at me, a smirk falling on his face as he did so. "Are you happy now?"

"What?" I wondered from him. "Why would I be happy? The ship is sinking."

"You thought I deserved this," Cal said. "Rose said you knew all along about how she never wanted me. You were waiting for the day that she said to me...waiting for me to suffer..."

"You don't know what you're talking about," I assured him. "You're looking like a fool, Cal. What are you going to do? Are you going to find her and force her to marry you? That is assuming she doesn't run off with Jack first."

"Oh, and you really are loving this," Cal informed me.

I shook my head, moving from Edwards grasp to grab onto my brother's lapels, shaking him slightly.

"I don't like any of this," I promised him. "None of this is ideal for any of us. But...Cal...if Rose does not love you then you cannot force her to do anything. Don't torture her further. Leave her be to make her own way."

"And what about you?" Cal asked. "You need to get on a boat."

"No," I shook my head, reaching behind me for Edward's hand. Cal saw the motion and ran a hand over his chin. He shook his head back and forth, closing his eyes as he did so. "I cannot go...I will wait...there has to be other boats..."

"There are no boats for me," Edward promised me simply. "Your brother is right. You need to get on a boat. You need to go."

"Well there are no boats on this side of the deck," Cal said with a shake of his head. "They have all been allocated."

"What about the other side?" I wondered from him. "Are there any there?"

"I assume so," Cal said, offering me his arm.

I looked at him with disregard for a moment. I hated Cal for what he had done. I hated what he had become. But he was my brother. He was my elder brother. That had to count for something. I turned to look at Edward for a moment and he smiled down at me. His hand moved out to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Go," he urged me. "I have a job to do. Go and do all that you should do."

"Come with me," I urged him. "Please, Edward...at least try. You can row a boat."

"I am not an officer in command," he shook his head.

"I can manage an agreement," Cal suddenly spoke up, his eyes glaring at Edward for a second. "I have enough money to buy one of the officers. I can get him on a boat if he means that much to you. Besides, I suppose I am in debt to him after my earlier performance."

"You're going to buy your way out of this?" I checked with Cal. "Like you buy your way out of everything?"

"If it saves him, then why should you care?" Cal asked from me. "It should not matter, Emily. Now come along. You need to be going, don't you?"

"See?" Edward checked with me. "Your brother has a plan. Everything shall be fine."

"But...what if it doesn't work out? What if-"

Edward cut me off from my worries, his mouth descending to cover mine as I closed my eyes and allowed him to wrap his arms around my waist. I moved closer to him, kissing him with as much force as I could muster. I groaned against him for a second before he pulled away from me and looked down at me for a second.

"You're an amazing gal, Miss Emily," he assured me.

I stroked his cheek softly. "I'll be with you. I promise...I will stay with you."

"Always," he smiled back and looked across to Cal. "Come on, we need to go."

"I don't appreciate you frolicking with my sister in front of me," Cal grunted to Edward.

"Is now the time to worry about that?" I asked my brother as we moved down the deck. There were still some boats left on the deck. Nowhere near enough for everyone to get off safely.

"Emily!"

I looked around before I noted Rose rushing up to me. Her clothes were soaking wet and her hair was stuck to her pale face. She looked an absolute mess in front of me. I took of the jacket which Edward had given me before passing it to her. I wrapped it around her fragile form as Jack stood behind her. I could sense Cal's anger between us, but said nothing.

"Get on the boat," Cal suddenly said.

I turned around to notice that it was the last one in the line of them on the deck.

"No," Rose snapped at him. "I am going nowhere without Jack."

"It doesn't matter," Jack promised her as he stepped closer to her.

Cal suddenly removed his coat and handed me it, his eyes not once leaving Rose. I wondered if he did love her. I wondered if he truly cared for her, or whether he wanted her for her beauty.

I could never tell with Cal. But I did see the hurt in his eyes at that moment in time. I saw it without a doubt.

"No, it does matter," Rose complained as I felt Edward grab my hand again.

"Cal has an arrangement," I said suddenly to Rose. "He will take Jack with Edward. He will make sure they get on a boat."

She regarded me with caution, truly not sure whether Cal would save them. I had faith in him. I didn't know why I believed my brother. He had given me no reason to believe him. He had done everything to go against me. But...lives were at stake. Cal had to be telling the truth, didn't he? He couldn't be so cold. He said that he owed Edward. He was right. He had to do this for him.

"Emily speaks sense for once," Cal assured Rose, daring to tuck a strand of her hair behind her ear. "I have an arrangement in progress. Mr Dawson here can benefit from it. The boat is just on the deck above. But...you need to get on this boat with Emily. It is for women and children."

Hesitance struck me as Edward took hold of me by the waist and pushed me backwards. I looked at him with reluctance for a moment as he kissed me again. I closed my eyes for a second, trying my best not to cry in front of him.

"Promise me you will get off of here," I urged him.

"I will do my best," he promised softly, kissing the top of my head after a moment. "That is all I can do for you."

I nodded in content before looking at Cal who stood beside me. Jack was forcing Rose into the boat as Cal began to do the same for me.

"Promise me, Cal," I urged him. "Promise me that you will get off safely with Edward."

I looked into his eyes as he blatantly studied mine. He kept silent for a few seconds before nodding once.

"I know I have hurt you," he spoke. "I want to make it up to you, Emily. I want to make sure I do that. I will make sure he gets off this ship. I promise."

A moment of doubt came into my mind, but I pushed it away as the boat shuddered. Cal grabbed my hand and helped to lift me into the lifeboat. I looked back for a second as Edward stood beside Jack, a lazy grin on his face as he winked at me. He was trying to be brave, I knew that. He was trying to show me that he would be safe.

Glancing back at Cal, I looked at him as he nodded before muttering to Edward and Jack.

"Do you think there is an arrangement?" Rose asked me.

I said nothing for a second.

"Cal wouldn't lie," I whispered. "He wouldn't lie about something like this."

"Wouldn't he?" Rose wondered as the boat began to lower. "I don't trust him, Emily. I don't trust anything about him."

"He is my brother," I replied. "I know what he has done...but...death...no...I refuse to believe Cal is that cold."

"He had Edward locked up. He had Jack locked up too. He framed both of them. He is cold enough."

"No," I said adamantly. Why did I refuse to let go of Cal? Why did I refuse to see the worst in him? "He wouldn't. He can't."

"I can't do it, Emily," Rose spoke. "I can't go...knowing that Jack could...he...I love him...I love him more than I love Cal."

"Rose, Jack will be fine...I promise you..."

"No, you don't know. No one does," she said and stood up.

I shrieked as she rocked the boat and reached the edge of it.

"Rose!" I cried out as she jumped from the side of the lifeboat, her arms holding onto the side of the ship. I continued to yell as I moved too, reaching for the side of the ship. How could I be so selfish to leave Edward? Rose was committing the ultimate selfless act.

I pushed her feet up, making sure she tumbled back to the safety of the deck before I reached to wrap my hands around the wooden railings.

"No!" a voice yelled down to me. I looked up as the boat continued to drop, making it impossible for me to follow Rose in her escape attempt. "Emily! No! You will stay in that boat, do you understand me?"

Edward's gaze was stern and fixed on mine as I watched him and the boat continued to move downwards. Someone took hold of my arm and forced me to sit back down as I refused to look away from Edward. He was leaning right over the edge before he moved away and began to mess around with his pocket. He pulled out his red book and dropped it down the side of the ship. I reached for it and it fell into my lap.

His book of tales.

I ran my hand over the cover before looking at him, wondering what I could say to him. I would see him again. I had to see him again. But why would he give me his book? Why would he give me it if he knew Cal had an arrangement?

It made no sense.

I recalled Cal muttering to Jack and Edward and thought of Rose's disbelief in my brother. Had she been right? The look in Edward's eyes told me enough as I stifled a sob, my hand covering my mouth as Edward pressed his fingers to his lips and blew me a kiss. No. How could he have done this? How could he have been so callous?

"No," I whispered. "No...he can't..."

"Sh, dear," a woman next to me said. "Don't get hysterical. Crying will achieve nothing."

The lifeboat finally hit the water as Edward remained stood where he was. I could have sworn I saw his eyes glistening before I yelled at him with all my might.

"Go!" I called out. I didn't want him to stand there and watch me. "Do something! Edward! Go! Please...I...I need you!"

"Love, calm down," the woman said again.

Edward looked back at me as he made a small salute. I saw him stand tall and move off before I yelled out to him. I yelled the three words which I never thought I would say. The three words which I had never said before. I didn't know if I believed myself until I had spoken them. But he didn't turn around.

He didn't hear me and the guilt began to eat me up again as the sobs came out freely.


	11. Chapter 11

The lifeboat was quiet for the rest of the night. We all sat there, watching as the Titanic vanished from sight. The screams from each person rang through our ears, keeping all of us awake and sobbing. I listened intently, as if doing so would allow me to pinpoint Edward's location. But none of it made any sense to me. The cries echoed through the night as the ship finally disappeared. I held the book tightly in my lap, refusing to let it go as a tear rolled down my cheek.

Everyone who I had begun to care for was on that ship. Rose had been selfless. She had seen straight through Cal. She had done what I could not. My trust for my brother was something which I couldn't let go. I had seen what he had turned into. I had seen what he had done to Edward. Why did I believe him? Rose could have perished. Jack could have perished. Cal could have joined them. And then there was Edward. Sweet Edward.

I closed my eyes as the tears began to fall from my eyes again. I placed a hand over my mout to keep myself from sobbing freely and loudly. I would have loved for nothing else.

The morning came around slowly as rain began to pour down from the sky. The Carpathia finally came into sight as people scrambled to climb aboard. I took my time, the book still in my hand. I tucked it into the coat which Cal had given me and stood on deck, watching as other lifeboats made their way to the ship.

My eyes scanned around as I longed to see Edward somewhere there. I needed to see that he was safe. But he did not come. Not once did I see anyone who vaguely resembled him. As soon as the final lifeboat made it, I knew there had been no sighting of him. I had seen Cal and Rose's mother, but I had not seen Rose or Jack.

I dug my hand into the pocket of the coat which I wore, pulling out the book again and holding it tightly in my hands.

"Emily."

The voice was cold and harsh to my ears. I winced as soon as he spoke my name. I turned around from the railings, my hands clenched into balls as I saw him stood there. No sign of emotion crossed his face, and I wondered if he knew what had just happened. I wondered if he had any inclination of what had just happened.

"You..." he trailed off as if words had failed him. "You made it."

"I did," I replied back, my voice nothing more than a whisper. "And you did."

"Yes," Cal whispered. "I...have you seen Rose? I intended to look for her after I had found you."

"No." I said. "And if I had, I wouldn't tell you, Cal."

"Em-"

"-No," I interrupted him, tiring of listening to his lies. "You never did intend to help Edward or Jack, did you?"

He couldn't even deny it. After everything that had happened, he couldn't deny it to me. Not that I could blame him. He always had been cold.

"I needed to get you off the ship." Cal implored. "You know that I had to do that for you, Emily."

I placed my hand over my mouth again before looking to Cal, knowing full well that he was not the brother I had grown up with. Nothing else appealed to me except for escaping from him.

"No," I snapped. "You lied to me. You let Edward...you lied to him..."

"I had no choice," Cal said, stepping closer to me and moving his hand to my shoulder. I jumped back from him, tugging at the coat which I wore before I shook my head.

"You always had a choice," I told him. "And I have a choice too. As soon as this ship docks, I am leaving, Cal. I am going."

"Don't talk daft," Cal hissed, running a hand through his hair as I shook my head, looking to the lower deck in an attempt to escape from Cal and his constant fretting. There was nothing more to the conversation.

"I'm not," I promised him. "You can see that, can't you, Cal? I refuse to go back with you after what you did."

I rushed away from him, knowing full well that he would come after me in time. The ship wasn't large enough to hide from him. I moved down the steps to the lower deck, looking around for anyone who I could recognise. I had been told that the bottom deck was full of people who I would not want to be associated with. I ignored the officer and looked around, noting the red curls of a woman. I stepped forwards, wondering if it could be her. She turned around at the last minute and I stood still. I'd been mistaken.

"I hope you didn't get my book wet."

I cannot explain what I felt at that moment in time. Multiple emotions rushed through me as soon as I turned around to see him stood there. A blanket covered his shoulders and his brow had been scratched. His lip was cut and his uniform dishevelled. I ignored his previous comment and rushed towards him with haste. I pushed my hands around his neck, holding him tightly as his arms found my waist.

"I can't believe you're here," I whispered. "I waited...I waited for you..."

"I know," he replied in a whisper. "I'm here now, Emily. I'm here, and I won't leave you."

"Thank God."

I pulled back and he looked down at me, slowly kissing me again as I felt a moment of relief come over me. We pulled back and I looked over my shoulder to see Cal stood on the upper deck, his eyes set on me. He gave me a brief nod before turning around. I knew what that meant. He wouldn't try to stop me leaving. Although I doubted anything could stop me from leaving.

Edward looked back down at me, slowly prising his book from my fingers as I ran a hand down his cheek.

"We're in this mess together, right?" I checked.

"For as long as you can stand me."

I smiled at him then, kissing his cheek.

"I think I can manage that."

...

A/N: I felt like giving a happy ending to this short story! So thanks to anyone who read and reviewed.


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